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RE: Not sure what signals I'm getting.... - 7/16/2008 10:38:53 AM
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MWD
Posts: 163
Joined: 8/23/2006
From: New Hampshire
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First of all, pretend this guy doesn't even exist. Then, list precisely what you want in a man, and what you want out of any new relationship with a man -- both short term and long term.
_____________________________
"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he doesn't exist."
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RE: Not sure what signals I'm getting.... - 7/16/2008 12:16:51 PM
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rayofson
Posts: 9188
Joined: 4/11/2005
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It's so hard to tell for sure if he has romantic feelings toward you but seems encouraging. Obviously, he likes your company. Also you know that he's marriage-minded. Most guys with that perspective wouldn't waste their time getting to know someone in whom they aren't interested as a mate. Even if he isn't thinking relationship right now, it seems very possible at some point.
Don't worry about the age difference. It's only an issue if you make it one.
_____________________________
Please don't feed the Ogre.
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RE: Not sure what signals I'm getting.... - 7/16/2008 12:57:33 PM
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APZR
Posts: 911
Joined: 4/18/2005
From: GA
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Ditto to the Ray man. And the 10 year age difference isn't as big of a deal when you are an older mature adult.. it would be a big difference if you were 19. However, one thing that does need to be worked out, since he's in his early 30's, is does he expect to have kids? Myself quickly approaching 40, that would be a problem. I have kids and do not want to start over again, so for me that could be a deal killer if a condition for any relationship.
_____________________________
Ya can't keep trouble from visitin, but you don't have to offer it a chair.
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RE: Not sure what signals I'm getting.... - 7/16/2008 1:15:17 PM
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SavedByGraceMD
Posts: 899
Joined: 2/13/2008
From: the poconos
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quote:
ORIGINAL: rayofson
It's so hard to tell for sure if he has romantic feelings toward you but seems encouraging. Obviously, he likes your company. Also you know that he's marriage-minded. Most guys with that perspective wouldn't waste their time getting to know someone in whom they aren't interested as a mate. Even if he isn't thinking relationship right now, it seems very possible at some point.
Don't worry about the age difference. It's only an issue if you make it one.
I also agree with ray here. I think he wouldn't be spending so much time with you, if he wasn't interested.
_____________________________
Isaiah 41:10
"Fear not for I am with you,
Do not be dismayed for I am your God,
I will strengthen you and help you,
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand"
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RE: Not sure what signals I'm getting.... - 7/17/2008 12:27:16 AM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1177
Joined: 6/1/2008
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Tygran,
Someone said it would be important to do this, and I don't think it was realized that you already did...
quote:
OK. We are NOT dating, nor has there been any discussion of it. Although I know he wants to get married and have a family.
I like MWD's response.
Dave Ramsey would suggest considering individual incomes, and what a marriage might demand of the wage earners in the family.
I personally think he's waiting for you to ask him out on a date. I think it would be a fair statement that he could be intimidated by becoming a father figure to children half your age, but maybe that's just me. Since they are just 10 years or so younger than he is... . Have you, your friend, and your kids done some things together? Maybe that could be a next step for everyone? No dating yet, just a way for everyone to have some fun together? Especially something like rock wall climbing or something where your friend can be a little bit of a big brother yet also have a feeling of a father? Since he is halfway between you and your kids agewise, he could be having a real big brother complex that would need to be hurdled(?) would you two date?
I'm babbling on. Forgive the babble and just focus on whatever good stuff is buried in there.
Best wishes, btw.
OneJohn410
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