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homeschool to public school support - 9/2/2008 10:04:05 PM
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crazemom
Posts: 24
Joined: 1/14/2008
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Hey ladies,
I homeschooled for 8 years and overall it has been a very good experience, absolutely no regrets! Lately I've been very burned out though. Usually it doesn't happen until mid year, but this year I started the year burned out.
My oldest went to high school this year. My youngest three are still home. I am so apprehensive about it! Anyone else gone from hs to ps? Any suggestions for the transition? I guess my biggest worry is: will he be able to stand up for what is right? He is going to be exposed to so much more than he has ever been exposed to. I know this is really his test and not mine. I guess I figure if he fails I failed you know what I mean? I know a lot of this is false thinking, but nonetheless real. He is not a follower or confomist, but he is really into this video game stuff and online gaming and that is where I see he could fall. It can be really addicting. I have always been able to monitor it of course and limit it, but now he's learning about all the other games that are out there and my space, etc..
How do you send you kids to school and not worry about what they are learning from the other kids? I'm sure you all do worry, but how do you deal with it?
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/2/2008 10:37:30 PM
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MrsTracy72
Posts: 1800
Joined: 2/28/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: crazemom
How do you send you kids to school and not worry about what they are learning from the other kids? I'm sure you all do worry, but how do you deal with it?
You answered your own question when you said "I'm sure you all do worry" I took my kids from private to public school last year, and I think that because of that, we are more diligent about everything from friends to internet to tv. I think that my kids have grown stronger in their faith and convictions in being exposed to "the real world" and I say the real world because alot of people think that kids who are in private schools or HSed are sheltered, but that is not true of most people.
It is going to be an adjustment for you, but it is going to be a great learning experience for your kids and if you are getting burnt out, then you obviously need to do something because you are no good to them if you can't put the time and effort into what it takes to HS.
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/2/2008 11:50:21 PM
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garsyt
Posts: 2228
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: the bottom of the laundry basket
Status: online
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I went from homeschooling to public schooling many years ago with my eldest. While it was way back in third grade and he is now a freshman, I believe some of the tips are still valid.
Communication- like my friend Tinkerbell said! My kids KNOW that when I ask how their school day was I expect more then just, "oh fine." The kids know I expect more and they also know that I'm in the building enough to hear about things so they are better off telling me about things then letting me hear it from anyone else.
And PRAYER - cover them in prayer daily.
Set limits and boundaries and stick to them. Expect more then the bare minimum from your kids and they will deliver!
Now about the failure thing. Stop it. Stop it now. I too, wrongly, felt like a failure when my hubby and I decided to send my eldest and the rest of them to public school. I did feel like I was giving up. I felt that everyone would see me as the person that gave up on her kids. I quickly learned differently. I didn't fail my kids because I gave them a love for learning, and that carried over to public school!
I don't think you need to worry about him too much if you keep on top of things, communicate, and cover him in prayer.
Blessings,
Garsy
_____________________________
My Blog: www.moredayslikethisplease.wordpress.com
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/3/2008 9:25:00 AM
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kernsfamily
Posts: 1337
Joined: 4/26/2006
From: Dallas (originally Detroit)
Status: offline
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quote:
How do you send you kids to school and not worry about what they are learning from the other kids? I'm sure you all do worry, but how do you deal with it?
quote:
Now about the failure thing. Stop it. Stop it now. I too, wrongly, felt like a failure when my hubby and I decided to send my eldest and the rest of them to public school. I did feel like I was giving up. I felt that everyone would see me as the person that gave up on her kids. I quickly learned differently. I didn't fail my kids because I gave them a love for learning, and that carried over to public school!
My inlaws were the VERY same way....and they were furious that we prayerfully made the decision to allow our daughters the privilege to attend our neighborhood public school.
While you're all worried about what your kids will be learning from other kids.....take it from me, and know that when our kids went to school, they were, and still are, "positive role models"...."good influences"....."leaders"......
Iam sure he knows other kids in the school from church and other activities, right? Encourage that he "hang out" and congregate with them.....kind of a "support group".....
The next important thing is parental INVOLVEMENT in school.....that is a MUST.....
as far as "standing up for what is right" and all.....he's likely headed off to college soon....and, that's TOTALLY different than something like this.....
quote:
Hey ladies,
i'll just let that one go....
(kind of reminds me of Jerry Lewis......LADY! HEY LADY!!!!!.....)
_____________________________
Proud dad of 3 great girls....Erin, Emilie and Elise
Blessed to have all of them in a "totally awesome" public elementary school!
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/8/2008 3:19:28 PM
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crazemom
Posts: 24
Joined: 1/14/2008
Status: offline
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Thank you for everyone's tips and encouragement.
quote:
ORIGINAL: kernsfamily
quote:
How do you send you kids to school and not worry about what they are learning from the other kids? I'm sure you all do worry, but how do you deal with it?
quote:
Now about the failure thing. Stop it. Stop it now. I too, wrongly, felt like a failure when my hubby and I decided to send my eldest and the rest of them to public school. I did feel like I was giving up. I felt that everyone would see me as the person that gave up on her kids. I quickly learned differently. I didn't fail my kids because I gave them a love for learning, and that carried over to public school!
My inlaws were the VERY same way....and they were furious that we prayerfully made the decision to allow our daughters the privilege to attend our neighborhood public school.
While you're all worried about what your kids will be learning from other kids.....take it from me, and know that when our kids went to school, they were, and still are, "positive role models"...."good influences"....."leaders"......
Iam sure he knows other kids in the school from church and other activities, right? Encourage that he "hang out" and congregate with them.....kind of a "support group".....
The next important thing is parental INVOLVEMENT in school.....that is a MUST.....
as far as "standing up for what is right" and all.....he's likely headed off to college soon....and, that's TOTALLY different than something like this.....
quote:
Hey ladies,
i'll just let that one go....
(kind of reminds me of Jerry Lewis......LADY! HEY LADY!!!!!.....)
Kernsfamily: I'm not sure if you have ever homeschooled yourself or if you simply don't understand why people may choose to homeschool.
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/8/2008 3:34:05 PM
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crazemom
Posts: 24
Joined: 1/14/2008
Status: offline
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Kernsfamily:
I didn't finish my posting before it was posted. What I meant was to ask if you have ever actually homeschooled yourself? This posting was meant for those who have gone from homeschooling to public school.
Your post: "My inlaws were the VERY same way....and they were furious that we prayerfully made the decision to allow our daughters the privilege to attend our neighborhood public school. "
I have never given anyone any flack for sending their kids to public school and I think it is terrible when people do just as it would be the other way around. It is also a privilege to be homeschooled.
Your post: "While you're all worried about what your kids will be learning from other kids.....take it from me, and know that when our kids went to school, they were, and still are, "positive role models"...."good influences"....."leaders"...... "
Many kids do just fine in public school. Homeschooling worries whether of a peer pressure nature or academic nature are legitimate concerns. I am glad your kids have always been "positive role models". One great bonus to homeschooling is the amount of time we have to influence or kids. That time is reduced enormously when we send our kids to public school. They can still turn out great of course either way, but there is nothing wrong with wanted to increase our odds?
your post: "as far as "standing up for what is right" and all.....he's likely headed off to college soon....and, that's TOTALLY different than something like this.....
quote:
Hey ladies,
i'll just let that one go....
(kind of reminds me of Jerry Lewis......LADY! HEY LADY!!!!!.....)"
Could you please elaborate. I can't help but think this is an insult somehow. Sorry if I offended you if for saying "Hey ladies". I thought this was a friendly not critical forum. I do appreciate the tips that you did give (which was all I was asking for)
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/8/2008 5:35:29 PM
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kernsfamily
Posts: 1337
Joined: 4/26/2006
From: Dallas (originally Detroit)
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: garsyt
quote:
Hey ladies,
i'll just let that one go....
(kind of reminds me of Jerry Lewis......LADY! HEY LADY!!!!!.....)"
Could you please elaborate. I can't help but think this is an insult somehow. Sorry if I offended you if for saying "Hey ladies". I thought this was a friendly not critical forum. I do appreciate the tips that you did give (which was all I was asking for)
It's because Kernsfamily is a man and not a lady. He was taking it in stride - I doubt he was offended all that much.
Blessings,
Garsy
yes..taking in stride (offended? me?)......and, a very frequent contributor here in the "Public School" area here........(and, you're obviously not familiar with old Jerry Lewis comedy routines......)
< Message edited by kernsfamily -- 9/8/2008 5:51:13 PM >
_____________________________
Proud dad of 3 great girls....Erin, Emilie and Elise
Blessed to have all of them in a "totally awesome" public elementary school!
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/8/2008 5:50:38 PM
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kernsfamily
Posts: 1337
Joined: 4/26/2006
From: Dallas (originally Detroit)
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: crazemom
Kernsfamily:
I didn't finish my posting before it was posted. What I meant was to ask if you have ever actually homeschooled yourself? This posting was meant for those who have gone from homeschooling to public school.
Your post: "My inlaws were the VERY same way....and they were furious that we prayerfully made the decision to allow our daughters the privilege to attend our neighborhood public school. "
I have never given anyone any flack for sending their kids to public school and I think it is terrible when people do just as it would be the other way around. It is also a privilege to be homeschooled.
Your post: "While you're all worried about what your kids will be learning from other kids.....take it from me, and know that when our kids went to school, they were, and still are, "positive role models"...."good influences"....."leaders"...... "
Many kids do just fine in public school. Homeschooling worries whether of a peer pressure nature or academic nature are legitimate concerns. I am glad your kids have always been "positive role models". One great bonus to homeschooling is the amount of time we have to influence or kids. That time is reduced enormously when we send our kids to public school. They can still turn out great of course either way, but there is nothing wrong with wanted to increase our odds?
your post: "as far as "standing up for what is right" and all.....he's likely headed off to college soon....and, that's TOTALLY different than something like this.....
quote:
Hey ladies,
i'll just let that one go....
(kind of reminds me of Jerry Lewis......LADY! HEY LADY!!!!!.....)"
Could you please elaborate. I can't help but think this is an insult somehow. Sorry if I offended you if for saying "Hey ladies". I thought this was a friendly not critical forum. I do appreciate the tips that you did give (which was all I was asking for)
sorry...just I thought I was responding to Garsy's earlier posts.....when SHE mentioned that she was made to feel like a failure, etc..etc...(as written in post #4)
nope...have not homeschooled, but am very experienced with the "ins and outs" of public school......and attempted to give you some helpful advice to ease the transition.....
quote:
or if you simply don't understand why people may choose to homeschool.
I do understand why SOME people homeschool....and why SOME people private school....and why SOME people public school.....
people make those decisions because, after truthfully looking at ALL options available.....and prayerfully considering ALL options....God leads you to a decision to select ONE.
that's how SOME people make their choice.....though, Iam sure there are MANY other reasons why people choose one over another....
_____________________________
Proud dad of 3 great girls....Erin, Emilie and Elise
Blessed to have all of them in a "totally awesome" public elementary school!
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/8/2008 10:28:40 PM
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MrsTracy72
Posts: 1800
Joined: 2/28/2007
Status: offline
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So Crazemom, have you already put your kids in school, or are you still in the decision making process? You said one is in high school and the little ones are still at home. Don't worry about your decision. Whatever you decide will be what is right for your family. I don't homeschool and never did, but I did run a daycare in my home for 10 years, and for alot of that time, I had a pre school lesson plan for my kids, but that burnt me out and I ended up enrolling the kids in a preschool at my old church when they were old enough.
My own kids were never home schooled with the exception of pre school and that was only for one of them so I am thinking that is just a drop in the bucket given that there are many many women who homeschool from preschool all the way through graduation.
But I did have to make the very difficult decision as to whether or not change my kids over from private to public school last school year and with the exception of the problems I am having with certian High School administrators, I have had a very positive experience and my kids are very well aware of their values, right and wrong and do avoid the wrong. I also know that is not always going to be the case, but that is normal for every child and if you have a parent tell you that their child is perfect and has never done wrong, either they are lying or are simply clueless.
Your kids are going to go through alot, but what you have taught them and the example you have shown them is at their core. Even if they ignore that for a few stupid moments or days or months, they will almost always come back to what they know.
Pray and decide based on what God tells you to do. If you end up sending the smaller kids to school, it is probably because that is what is best for everybody. But don't beat yourself up and worry about all the stuff that is bound to happen at one time or another anyway.
Keep the lines of communication open. Make sure their friends are decent and that you know and communicate with the parents and pray. God has a plan and so no matter what you do, he is going to follow through with that plan. Your kids will turn out fine, and if you see trouble starting to brew, you can always go back to HSing and probably not be so burnt out after a rest no matter how short it is. But if you find the right school, I am sure you will look back and have no regrets.
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/10/2008 2:51:33 PM
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crazemom
Posts: 24
Joined: 1/14/2008
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Thank you for your kind encouragement. I think I am going to send the younger ones to school soon. I'm not sure if it'll be next year, next semester, or next week. We are having a tough year. Only because my love for it is gone. I have absolutely no regrets having homeschooled for over 9 years! The concern I have with my girls are they are SOO social! They already want to do what everyone else is doing that I don't necessarily approve of. I have seen people at church that do not seem any different from the world and there of course are a handful of homeschool families too that don't seem any different. It is hard to teach your kids your value system when they say, "but so and so at church does it", then add "so and so at school", etc..
Since the schools have your kids for so many hours of the day do you all make time for evening devotions and time to talk, read together, etc..? I am so used to doing most of that during the day. After a long day at school my oldest doesn't seem to have much time to do an evening devotion. We do spend about 30-60 minutes a night doing devotions and reading stories together, but it won't be nearly as much as we do now. How do you all keep in touch with your kids? Does anyone here do a family Bible study? Just trying to get ideas. I don't want to lose that precious time. I am not an evening person!
Also wondering if anyone here does not work outside the home. I haven't really worked outside the home for 12 years. If I stay home I'll be the only person I know at home. However, I really want to make sure I am home when my kids get home you know.
Kernsfamily: it's nice to see a dad here and no I'm not familar with Jerry Lewis films.
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/10/2008 2:53:17 PM
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crazemom
Posts: 24
Joined: 1/14/2008
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MrsTracy72: Would you belive for two years I homeschooled and did daycare? Talk about being a crazemom. That was when my kids were younger though so preschool wasn't too far from their level, but it was hard!!
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/10/2008 3:10:22 PM
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Tinkerbell_
Posts: 7685
Joined: 1/25/2008
From: NeverNeverLand
Status: online
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I'm a fairly no nonsense kind of parent. I'm a single mother with two boys and while I will agree it is hard to keep your children from conforming, it's not impossible. I am pretty firm on what I allow in the house and what I do.
However, I am EXTREMELY open minded and let my children do things that most parents wouldn't let their children do.
The bottom line is you just have to make sure you are firm on what you allow in your house, and be prepared to back it up. Sometimes "becausea I said so" doesn't cut it because children are intelligent and deserve to hear our reasoning, even it's "we as a family don't feel it's proper for Christians to do that..." or whatnot.
I think that because it's just me and the boys I tend to talk to them more about things then I would if it were a two parent home. We talk about EVERYTHING from my dating life, their lack of dating life and why, girls, boys, discipline, all that jazz.
I wish I had the option to chose between homeschool, or private school, or public school but since I don't, I put the boys education in the hands of God and know that He will protect them. So far so good. 
I wish you luck in your decisions and know I'm praying for you. *huggles*
_____________________________
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/10/2008 3:35:17 PM
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MrsTracy72
Posts: 1800
Joined: 2/28/2007
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: crazemom
Since the schools have your kids for so many hours of the day do you all make time for evening devotions and time to talk, read together, etc..? I am so used to doing most of that during the day. After a long day at school my oldest doesn't seem to have much time to do an evening devotion. We do spend about 30-60 minutes a night doing devotions and reading stories together, but it won't be nearly as much as we do now. How do you all keep in touch with your kids? Does anyone here do a family Bible study? Just trying to get ideas. I don't want to lose that precious time. I am not an evening person!
Also wondering if anyone here does not work outside the home. I haven't really worked outside the home for 12 years. If I stay home I'll be the only person I know at home. However, I really want to make sure I am home when my kids get home you know.
Kernsfamily: it's nice to see a dad here and no I'm not familar with Jerry Lewis films.
A little background. My kids went to a Christian school and while we were there for 6 years, it became more and more clear as the years went on that the behaviors that were being displayed and tolerated were not what I would expect of a Christian school. Mostly because of the tolerance level. So we did decide that we needed to get them out of there and our only option at the time was public school.
We talked and talked and prayed and my concern was that if they were not learning the bible in school and the same went for church. We didn't even have Sunday school for the kids because they assumed all kids would go to the school attached to the church, we needed to find a church that would better suit our family.
We found a WONDERFUL church and got involved. My kids go to school during the day. They have their soccer and dance classes at night, and once a week, they go to youth group while we go to bible study. This might sound bad, but they really don't have time for friends outside the classroom. But I don't really mind that. They have a couple of close friends from school. Friends from church, and friends from youth group. That is all they need in my opinion. I feel that a few good close friends are way better than 100 distant but not so decent friends.
We keep in touch by having dinner together as a family as often as we can between sports and work. Even if it is a pizza. Sundays are reserved for church and something, usually a meal. Saturdays are days that we try to get out and go places with the kids, and we do take mini vacations at the waterparks we can get to for a weekend here and there.
You will have the time to do all you want. And as for working. I will not work outside the home because another way to keep your kids safe in school is to be involved. Volunteer for whatever you can. Be there whenever you can. Teachers are so grateful to parents who are willing to take time and help them out. They have so much to do that if you can be there even once a week and staple papers, it is a blessing to them. And you can be at home for your kids when they get home.
I have had days where I did a reading group and ended up with my own child's group. So I got to spend that type of time with her during her school day. I loved it. So did she. My boy? Not so much, but he is 12 and would rather I crawl into a hole in the ground and stay there until he graduates.
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/10/2008 10:21:02 PM
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crazemom
Posts: 24
Joined: 1/14/2008
Status: offline
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Tracy72: you have encouraged me immensely! I so want to stay home, I only wish I knew someone else who shared in that desire as I do not really have any friends right now. We just moved to a small town of less than 5000 people. Our church is full of working moms. There are no homeschool families there or stay at home moms. I am very conservative which also leaves me out of the loop, even at church. It is very lonely. Why do so many women feel they must work these days? My dh is a teacher and doesn't bring home much money and we manage. I just wish more moms stayed home these days so we could you know sit on the porch and have a cup of coffee while the kids were in school once in awhile. We all need a support system.
I know what you mean by the Christian schools to as we went through that as well. It can be so very frustrating. Sometimes I want to run off and join the Amish, ok a lot of the time.
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RE: homeschool to public school support - 9/11/2008 10:37:38 PM
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MrsTracy72
Posts: 1800
Joined: 2/28/2007
Status: offline
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Oh my gosh, I am touched. 
Can you afford to stay home? I ran a daycare for quite a while and probably still should be, but I just got burnt out after so many years.
If you can afford to keep staying home, volunteering is the best way to meet people and make friends. Since I have been home with kids the last ten years, I lost touch with alot of my friends. But I found a WONDERFUL morning bible study and then I found another and then I found another, but it is a night study for couples that just so happens to coincide with youth group at a church nearby.
It is hard to stay home but now that you are able, sign up for anything and everything you can in the school. Your kids will transition easier, and they will love you for still being involved in their education, plus you will get lots of hugs from many thankful kids. That is the best.
We all need to make our choices based on what is right for us, but you sound ready to let them go, and not really wanting to go back to work, so go be a soccer mom or a field trip mom, or workout mom, or bowling mom. Find at least one thing for you and immerse yourself in the school as much as you want. It is all up to you. Personally I like to mix in both.
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