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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 12/23/2007 7:32:22 PM
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sharonjef2007
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Well, my future husband and I have been talking a lot about all of this. And this is what we have decided.... No protection at all. We will NOT be TTC. But, we are not going to try and prevent it either.
Reason? I'll try ANYTHING to try and treat the endometriosis. And, being parents has never been the problem. We both want at least 3 kids. I just never wanted to get pregnant. I still don't and it would not hurt my feelings at all if I never do. And, if we go a year or two and I don't get pregnant, there will be no infertility treatments. We can put that money toward adopting. But, if it does, pregnancy is temporary and there is just no way pregnancy can be worse then the endometriosis. (If I'm wrong about that, PLEASE let me know)
This is going to be one of the hardest things that I have ever done. But, it is something both of us have peace about.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 12/23/2007 9:48:48 PM
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clag4christ
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quote:
But, if it does, pregnancy is temporary and there is just no way pregnancy can be worse then the endometriosis. (If I'm wrong about that, PLEASE let me know)
Even with gestational diabetes both of my pregnancies have been a blessing and absolutely wonderful experiences!
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<-----Jael as Tinkerbell - Halloween 2008
If you don't want people to insult your intelligence; don't make it so obvious that you have none.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 12/23/2007 10:00:18 PM
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sharonjef2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: clag4christ
quote:
But, if it does, pregnancy is temporary and there is just no way pregnancy can be worse then the endometriosis. (If I'm wrong about that, PLEASE let me know)
Even with gestational diabetes both of my pregnancies have been a blessing and absolutely wonderful experiences!
Do you have endometriosis or fibroids? Scar tissue or adhesions?
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 12/23/2007 10:08:40 PM
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PrincessDonna
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From: Cow country, Upstate NY
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sharonjef2007
quote:
ORIGINAL: clag4christ
quote:
But, if it does, pregnancy is temporary and there is just no way pregnancy can be worse then the endometriosis. (If I'm wrong about that, PLEASE let me know)
Even with gestational diabetes both of my pregnancies have been a blessing and absolutely wonderful experiences!
Do you have endometriosis or fibroids? Scar tissue or adhesions?
I'm not Kim, but I have endometriosis, adhesions, large chocolate cysts, pelvic separation that gets worse with pregnancy, and I'm sure scar tissue from my previous surgery. Pregnancy is wonderful compared to endometriosis and cysts. Any discomfort that comes with pregnancy is temporary and for a purpose (carrying a healthy baby).
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He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
~Psalm 91:4~
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 12/23/2007 10:19:22 PM
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sharonjef2007
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quote:
I was just trying to encourage you that pregnancy is a wonderful thing that you will hopefully enjoy if the Lord so chooses to bless you and Ray.
I know that was your intention. However, it is something I'm just not going to buy into or understand until if/when it happens to me. I'm still hoping to does not happen to me, but I'll let God decide that one.
According to my doc, getting pregnant is not going to be easy for me. So, I guess that is part of the reason I'm not too upset about not using the BC.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 12/23/2007 10:28:29 PM
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PrincessDonna
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From: Cow country, Upstate NY
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sharonjef2007
What is the pain and discomfort of pregnancy like compared to all the other junk?
Without my pelvic separation (which you don't have and probably won't get), it would be a piece of cake compared to the other stuff.
_____________________________
He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
~Psalm 91:4~
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 12/24/2007 6:24:39 AM
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PrudentWife
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I think it would be very hard to predict what your pregnancies will be like. Some women have a walk in the park, and other women have a horrible experience. Even in the same woman, her experience could vary pregnancy by pregnancy.
If you feel at peace with decision, then you are being directed by the Lord. When and if you do conceive, He'll give you the strength to carry your baby.
My husband and I also didn't care if we had biological children or if we adopted. We just didn't have that intense longing to have bio kids that others do. But the Lord saw fit to bless us with surprise conceptions. Pregnancy has been much harder than I ever imagined, and like you, I'm not one of those women infatuated with the process. However, it truly is incredible to see God use imperfect me to bring such a perfect miracle into the world.
Pregnancy is not like a chronic disease. Even though the symptoms may feel like it sometimes, it is a challenge that serves a purpose - bringing life into the world. I know you've heard all this before, but it really bears repeating. Pregnancy is unlike any other hardship you'll ever face because you know with pregnancy what God is doing and what His end result will be. You know when the hardship will end, and you know the result will be a human being who is needed here and now to bring glory to Him.
2 Corinthians 4:17 And this small and temporary trouble we suffer will bring us a tremendous and eternal glory, much greater than the trouble. (Good News Translation)
2 Corinthians 4:17 For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory. (New King James)
Hugs to you Sharon. I know you've come a long way in the last few months. Laying down our will and accepting God's will and plan can be challenging sometimes, but I know you will not regret your decisions!
_____________________________
 Mooing for 25 consecutive months and counting
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 12/27/2007 11:26:41 PM
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sharonjef2007
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quote:
Hugs to you Sharon. I know you've come a long way in the last few months. Laying down our will and accepting God's will and plan can be challenging sometimes, but I know you will not regret your decisions!
Eh.....even so, I'm still praying every day that God blesses me by not allowing me to get pregnant. I know God is going to do what God wants to do, and that is His perogative. I'll live with it if God does see to it that I have a baby. But after that first one, I sure will have a much easier time finding a doc to fix me...LOL!
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/15/2008 10:41:52 PM
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sharonjef2007
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Hey ladies....I found this on the planned parenthood web site about the effectiveness of diaphragms, FemCaps and Leas sheild. Is this consistent with what you know?
quote:
Effectiveness
Sixteen out of 100 women who use the diaphragm will become pregnant during the first year of typical use.* Six will become pregnant with perfect use.**
Fourteen out of 100 women who have never been pregnant or given birth vaginally and use FemCap will become pregnant during the first year of typical use. Of 100 women who have given birth vaginally and use FemCap, 29 will become pregnant during the first year of typical use.*** Effectiveness rates for perfect use are not available.
Fifteen out of 100 women who use the shield will become pregnant during the first year of typical use. Effectiveness rates for perfect use are not available.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/15/2008 10:49:26 PM
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clag4christ
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I don't know about stats that are found on a Planned Parenthood website...
I thought that you and Ray had decided not to use any form of birth control.
_____________________________
<-----Jael as Tinkerbell - Halloween 2008
If you don't want people to insult your intelligence; don't make it so obvious that you have none.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/15/2008 10:57:23 PM
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sharonjef2007
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I'm not as comfortable with not using any birth control as I thought I was. I DO NOT want to go unprotected. My fh and I have to talk about this more...and we continue to talk about it. But there is just no way I'm going to be free and fully enjoy intimacy with him if I'm afraid the whole time I'm gonna end up knocked up.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/15/2008 11:01:52 PM
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clag4christ
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I understand that you are afraid....but we are called to not be slaves to fear in our lives. NFP is really really very reliable. If your fiance is at peace with no 'protection' then you might have to bite the bullet and surrender this over. If the Lord blesses you with a baby then you'll come to terms with that. If not then you'll go on with your life too.
_____________________________
<-----Jael as Tinkerbell - Halloween 2008
If you don't want people to insult your intelligence; don't make it so obvious that you have none.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/15/2008 11:05:36 PM
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sharonjef2007
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I'm not doing NPF. It can be used in two ways....the first to know when you ovulate so that you can prevent pregnancy and second so you know when you ovulate so you can get pregnant. I would rather be dumb to when I am fertile and just be protected the entire month. You have seen in here with people who have been protected during the fertile times and STILL end up pregnant.
If God busts through two or three lines of protection, then I'll know it was God's will. Otherwise, it is simply biology and I'm not interested in that kind of biology.
And, fear is not the reason I don't want to be pregnant. I'm sick and tired of dealing with thoes organs in my body and all the junk that has come along with them since I was 12! I'm 30 now, so it has been more then half of my life dealing with it. There is no guarantee if pregnancy will make it worse or better or not make a difference at all and I'm not willing to take that risk. I still have the "alien effect" issue and I still think pregnancy and childbirth is a bit gross. But that is not a fear. It is simply a desire to NOT be pregnant. No different then the desire to be pregnant and just as valid.
< Message edited by sharonjef2007 -- 1/15/2008 11:12:49 PM >
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/15/2008 11:08:58 PM
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clag4christ
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quote:
I'm not doing NPF. It can be used in two ways....the first to know when you ovulate so that you can prevent pregnancy and second so you know when you ovulate so you can get pregnant. I would rather be dumb to when I am fertile and just be protected the entire month. You have seen in here with people who have been protected during the fertile times and STILL end up pregnant.
People who ended 'up pregnant' by using NFP when they were trying to avoid didn't follow the rules properly.
Have you talked with your ob/gyn about getting fitted for a diaphragm? Your dh would not be able to 'feel' that barrier and it's is pretty reliable when used correctly and with a spermacide. Why do you want to be 'ignorant' about your body's cycles?
_____________________________
<-----Jael as Tinkerbell - Halloween 2008
If you don't want people to insult your intelligence; don't make it so obvious that you have none.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/15/2008 11:11:54 PM
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sharonjef2007
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I was actaully considering the lea's Shield thing. No fitting required since a lot of docs don't know how to properly fit for a diaphram anyhow.
However, the failure rate of them as posted above according to planned parenthood is still too much of a gamble for me.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/15/2008 11:25:14 PM
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sharonjef2007
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I actually don't think I should feel the need to defend my views on not wanting to be pregnant in a thread dedicated to not wanting to get pregnant and prevention.
And, I have heard everything you have said, and I'm not going to do NPF. You can stop preaching it to me now....thanks!
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my blog......Finally, a new last name!.......
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/15/2008 11:29:21 PM
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clag4christ
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sharonjef2007
I actually don't think I should feel the need to defend my views on not wanting to be pregnant in a thread dedicated to not wanting to get pregnant and prevention.
And, I have heard everything you have said, and I'm not going to do NPF. You can stop preaching it to me now....thanks!
I'm not asking you to defend you views on not wanting to get pg. Sorry if I came across that way. I understand you don't want to get pg...but it seems to me from your posts in here that you're looking for 'reassurance' that you're not gonna get pg on some type of birth control out there. You're just not going to get that. ALL birth control methods have a failure rate. That's why I said that I think you're going to have to deal with your fear. Pregnancy happens sometimes...
If NFP isn't for you then it's not for you...I'm not pushing it on you...
< Message edited by clag4christ -- 1/15/2008 11:36:24 PM >
_____________________________
<-----Jael as Tinkerbell - Halloween 2008
If you don't want people to insult your intelligence; don't make it so obvious that you have none.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/15/2008 11:40:29 PM
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solo_soprano22
Posts: 2478
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From: I'm a Southern girl
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sharonjef2007
I actually don't think I should feel the need to defend my views on not wanting to be pregnant in a thread dedicated to not wanting to get pregnant and prevention.
And, I have heard everything you have said, and I'm not going to do NPF. You can stop preaching it to me now....thanks!
Sharon, I've just been lurking in here, but I'm not too cool with NFP. I know it works for some couples, but I know too many who'd cross their hearts they did everything right but still got pregnant. If it works it works; if it doesn't, it doesn't.
I haven't really been following the entire thread though. Are you and he opposed to just getting things removed? Or do you think you might change your mind and don't want to go that route? If some of the male birth controls come out, would he be willing to use something while you are too (to lessen the chances-- and assuming they're safe)?
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/17/2008 1:20:56 PM
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Desert_ratt44
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I'm leary of NFP as well. There is a joke about it, but I won't post it in case someone takes offense. All I can say is that I've known three women who have practiced it, and all three have gotten pregnant. It's just not a risk I'm willing to take right now.
We are comfortable using condoms and spermicidal gel. I am personally not comfortable with taking the BCP because my hormones are wacky enough as it is and I don't need help with them.
Plus, I'm also too lazy to figure out charts and taking temperatures and scheduling dates around my ovulation time. I'm not a huge fan of scheduling sex.
Sharon, like some other women have said here, do what you feel comfortable with when you find it. I hope you can find something that works!
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***Becky***
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/17/2008 2:38:40 PM
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reach
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I don't know what i would do if I really, really did not want to get prego.
I do what I doing, as if I do get prego, then I am OK. As I want to start in the fall. But I really did not want to, I think I would do something hormonal, even though I can't stand the affects.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/17/2008 2:47:03 PM
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clag4christ
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quote:
ORIGINAL: reach
I don't know what i would do if I really, really did not want to get prego.
I do what I doing, as if I do get prego, then I am OK. As I want to start in the fall. But I really did not want to, I think I would do something hormonal, even though I can't stand the affects.
Or...if biological children aren't what are desired...then a 'permanent' solution either on the man's or the woman's side could be done.
_____________________________
<-----Jael as Tinkerbell - Halloween 2008
If you don't want people to insult your intelligence; don't make it so obvious that you have none.
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RE: The NOT TTC Support Thread..... - 1/17/2008 5:11:39 PM
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reach
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Actually that is true. My husband would have gotten a v already if it weren't for me wanting kids.
But I know 2 couples that the husband got a v and it did not work. So what do you do?
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