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RE: missionary - 3/26/2008 2:44:42 PM
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amyk
Posts: 455
Joined: 5/9/2005
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funny_girl,
I mean this sincerely, not to be judgmental of you. If you are at the point of thinking that you and your husband are so vitally important so that the Lord's work can continue, I wonder if you really need to just stop for a few weeks. By this I do not mean to say that what you are doing is not important; but I would be concerned when anyone, myself included, starts thinking that the work is DEPENDENT on me/us.
Just don't forget that God can do His own work without our "help." It is just really our privilege that He allows us to be the instruments through which He works. But if you get completely burned out, what good will you be to anyone?
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RE: missionary - 3/26/2008 3:42:19 PM
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funny_girl
Posts: 874
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I hope that I haven't come across that I'm so important.
Thanks for giving me permission to take a few weeks off!
You'd make a cool boss!
< Message edited by funny_girl -- 3/26/2008 10:31:31 PM >
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RE: missionary - 3/27/2008 12:16:41 AM
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stimulus
Posts: 180
Joined: 6/4/2005
Status: offline
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quote:
Sometimes we think that the only way to be a success is to hook up with a large cooperation. Having had experience with a large cooperation I can tell you that I don't regret not being under the covering of it. In fact, I think our ministry is much much greater because we probably would have been confined to that organization and it's policies. Being independent we are able to work with all the Christian denominations down here including the Catholic church. Ironically, the foreign denomination snatched us up and promoted us. We aren't 'recognized' very much in the US, but our foreign country has embraced and honored us. Just writing about it makes me feel so blessed and overwhelmed. I have to fight my own preconceived ideas. Often times our expectations are unreasonable.
Hi,
I hope it didn't sound I think missions agencies are the be-all-and-end-all of anything. I'm more than aware of their limits, the restrictions they can bring, and so on. I work for a denomination's missions department, after all.  I just do graphic and Web design, so it's not like I make truly important decisions, but I hate it when I have to tell a missionary 'no' because of a policy, despite their need. Thankfully, it doesn't happen often.
quote:
ORIGINAL: funny_girl
I'm licensed with the Mexican Assemblies of God.
...
My family and I live in Guadalajara, Mexico and we travel evangelizing in a tri state area of Jalisco, Michoacan, and Colima.
...
The intent for the op was to ask what some of you in ministry do to relax? I'd especially be interested hearing from another missionary!
I've been to Guadalajara... with an Assemblies of God team. What kind of relationships do you have with the other missionaries in your area? Has it been difficult for you to establish relationships with AG missionaries because you're licensed with the Mexican church?
I hope my question doesn't offend you. You may have great relationships with other missionaries and nationals, regardless of their denomination (or lack thereof). But the loneliness you mentioned doesn't make it sound like you have strong relationships with other Christian leaders, and I find it unfortunate that you haven't been able to develop those bonds with other missionaries in your area. I know it's a huge city, but there are other missionaries there, and I think becoming friends (or strengthening the friendships you do have) would go a long way in relieving both your stress and loneliness. Simply having local missionary friends you can ask, "hey, what do you do to relax? can I come?" would be wonderful.
quote:
One, is that my brain is constantly going and doesn't shut off.
If I haven't offended you yet, I'm going to try one more time (j/k).
That statement reads exactly like something I used to say about myself. When I happened to mention in passing to my doctor that I have a hard time falling asleep because "my brain is constantly going and doesn't shut off", he told me I was suffering from anxiety. Now, I'm not the worrying type - I don't worry, I just think.  I analyze the situation, thinking about what I can do to change or improve things (thus, it's really positive, not "worrying"). I'm not worried, just planning, strategizing, analyzing, thinking all the time. I'm perfectly at peace, secure in the knowledge that it will all be okay (I'm a really confident person), but I still struggle to "shut my brain off".
My doctor prescribed anti-anxiety medicine that day. I took it for a couple months during a particularly stressful time of my life. It made a difference. However, I realized that other things - like reducing my caffeine consumption - also made a huge difference. (Excuse me while I take a drink of my Coke. I shouldn't because it will interfere with my sleep, as I will lay awake thinking about all the ways I could have written this post, but I couldn't resist tonight.)
If your brain doesn't shut off, there may be a physiological reason for it. You might find that you would benefit from anxiety medication, reducing your caffeine intake, getting your thyroid checked, getting more physical exercise, or just learning how to control your thoughts and shut your brain off at times (ie, "meditation" techniques) might be beneficial. But you should be able to turn your brain off.
Lastly, I'll answer your question. What do I do to relax? It's a mix between hanging out with friends and spending time alone. I share lunch with a coworker most days, just talking about life, work, ministry, family, and anything else. I see other friends after church about once a week. But I'm big on spending time by myself - not necessarily "time with God", just time by myself. Reading is probably my top hobby, although I've really enjoyed knitting some in the last couple of years. I'm also gotten into playing volleyball with church friends about once a month lately, and I like the opportunity to do something physical, that lets me relieve a lot of stress, be with friends, but not have to talk much.
< Message edited by stimulus -- 3/28/2008 4:47:57 PM >
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RE: missionary - 3/27/2008 1:56:43 AM
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funny_girl
Posts: 874
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What kind of relationships do you have with the other missionaries in your area?
Actually, we have a very good working relationship and the missionaries with Bill Gotherd, YWAM, and Assemblies of God. They attend the church my husband is pastoring when they are not out ministering and participate in our crusades. We're also very good friends with the Fire Institute missionaries.
My husband also has an amazing relationship with our district leaders and currently is the evangelism director for the district.
Has it been difficult for you to establish relationships with AG missionaries because you're licensed with the Mexican church?
Can I plead the 5th, haha Thank you for the giggle!!!! Being licensed has nothing to do with the relationships. There is one, that attends our church that we're pretty good friends with. Some of the other A/G missionaries had participation in 2 of our crusades. One crusade was so crazy that I was completely unaware that they were there doing kids ministry and found out months later. The last crusade, I arrived after the college team performed a drama that my husband said was done with excellence and I'm sorry I missed it. We don't have a fellowship with them and that is sad to us and we hope to change that.
This would make for an interesting discussion. We would like to see a greater bridge with the missionaries to the nationals. Being that we came down independent we've been greatly influenced by the nationals and honestly view some things a bit differently than some of the other missionaries. This could be the case across the board. Some click better than others. We're observing that language can be a huge barrier if the missionary hasn't grasped the new language. Cultural differences are an issue as well. Relationships are far greater than a task. Saving face is so huge here. It's hard for us north Americans to comprehend how important relationships are. You must be approachable and you cannot hide your feelings. Latino's are so in tune with how they feel that we American's would think it unstable, but it's not. A lot of our mental problems are from lack of relationships. I was having a bad day Monday. I didn't want to bother anyone who knows me so I got on line and found a Christian forum that I could vent on for a day. See what I mean? I'm going to be fine now. What's a counselor? A friend who listens to you while you figure things out. Right???
I think I really started out here on the wrong foot. It's seems rather silly now. Everybody praying for me has already helped so much and I'm thinking a lot more clearly than I was on Monday. Thank you so much everybody!! I had a bad day and now I'm gonna make it!
stimulus,
How long ago did you come down to Guadalajara, what missionary were you with and what did you do????
< Message edited by funny_girl -- 3/27/2008 2:06:41 AM >
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RE: missionary - 3/27/2008 2:45:59 AM
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amyk
Posts: 455
Joined: 5/9/2005
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funny_girl,
I did not mean to come across as though you are not important, because of course we are important to God. And of course if we are doing God's will, we are doing important work. I think you get what I meant, though. And sometimes "important work" could even mean taking a good rest and refueling spiritually, physically, emotionally, etc. 
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RE: missionary - 3/27/2008 11:06:49 AM
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funny_girl
Posts: 874
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I thought you were saying God didn't need us(any people), how silly that would be.
Yes, my husband and I are concentrating on what we need to do to 'check out' and rest. Praise the Lord our relationship is very important to us and we want to take care of ourselves.
Our conflict is that I'm more comfortable in our home in Guadalajara and he's more comfortable in Chapala, where he pastors an hour away. The apartment has a bathtub for him.
I think we should buy a hot tub. There's nothing wrong with that, we need to take care of ourselves.
Everything is for a season. We don't know how long we'll be here. Maybe a month, maybe 5 years, 10 years...we don't know. Someone mentioned early on that it could be the conclusion of this chapter of our lives, maybe and I'm certainly open to that. I want whatever God's will is for our lives because He always saves the best for us, doesn't He?
I'm curious as to what people would think if we were to return to the states and take short missions trips? Give me your feed back from someone who only knows me from what I've written. Do you think we could be real effective state side? Or have times so changed that we would be just as frustrated returning home after so much has happened to us here? We're big nobodies in the states! Haha It's a mental thing here, I think it's because the Latins are so relational that everybody is important, they sometimes treat us like we're VIP! It's humbling. That sounds so arrogant.
Another thought, many sending agencies have 4 year terms. Then the missionaries go back for a year. We just completed 4 years. There have times during the year we went back for a month. Last summer, we went back for a remodel during the summer and due to paper work, we were out for 3 months. Are there any other missionaries on the board that have done the 4 year on 1 year off? What are your comments about that? Many missionaries don't go back.
Comments please.
< Message edited by funny_girl -- 3/27/2008 11:53:46 AM >
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RE: missionary - 3/27/2008 12:27:51 PM
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Kath
Posts: 17217
Joined: 2/28/2005
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quote:
Since I can't get anyone to delete this thread and I messed it up, I'll just prove to myself how humbled I can actually be by picking up my chin and carry on!
{{{hugs}}}
I'm glad you started your thread again :)
_____________________________
"It's going to be bad around here when the cows come home to roost."
Dilbert's TRUE QUOTES FROM INDUHVIDUALS
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RE: missionary - 3/27/2008 9:54:52 PM
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funny_girl
Posts: 874
Status: offline
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LOL! stimulus!!!! You went to a Danilo Montero worship concert!!!! Remember! If my memory serves me right. Danilo is a well known worship artist in Latin America. Kinda like the Darlene Zschech from Hillsongs or the Gaither's from the English world. Were you there? If you were, I met his team at the concert. Want to know what happened after the concert? My friends and I waited for one of our friends, who rode with us, because he knew one of the band members and was visiting with him. We waited and waited. We waited so long that we went out to my 15 passenger van to wait. Next thing I knew the whole Danilo band piles in MY van and we all went to dinner with him! I didn't know who Danilo was and he was so patient with me as I was learning Spanish. He shared with us his testimony and it was great! After dinner, my friend exclaimed, "That was so cool! He's so famous! LOL! I didn't even know who he was! Latino's for the most part don't think more highly of themselves than they ought and everyone is important and approachable. I love this about Mexico!
I'm very familiar with this college program you're talking about and we are pushing for it from our end. My husband was very impressed with the work of the team when they ministered at a crusade this past fall. I met some of the team this past fall at the March for Jesus in downtown Guadalajara. 10,000 Christians filled the main plaza! It was amazing! All I knew is that we were going to be leading the A/G church with our van and some sound equipment. I was overwhelmed with how it all unfolded and it was incredible!
We also enjoy very much working with the YWAMer's. Their base is out here in Chapala. The YWAMer's have been doing a VBS this week for our church and are doing an great job!
Kath,
Thanks for letting me embarrass myself, squirm a little and get over it! You are right that there are some very nice people here!
< Message edited by funny_girl -- 3/27/2008 10:07:11 PM >
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RE: missionary - 3/27/2008 10:06:41 PM
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stimulus
Posts: 180
Joined: 6/4/2005
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: funny_girl
What kind of relationships do you have with the other missionaries in your area?
Actually, we have a very good working relationship and the missionaries with...
That's fantastic. I hope it didn't sound like I thought you didn't have friends. Like you said, you had a bad day, and you turned here for a little support. That's what it's for, it's just never a substitute for the "real thing" either, and I wanted to make sure you were connected.
quote:
My husband also has an amazing relationship with our district leaders and currently is the evangelism director for the district.
Is your husband a Mexican national? Or does he (and maybe you) have dual citizenship? Him being the evangelism director for the district, and you being licensed by them, makes me think you might be dual citizens.
Not that it really matters, but if you are Mexicans or dual citizens, that helps to explain why you might not be as connected to the American missionaries (AG or otherwise) as you might be if you were also American missionaries to Mexico. You would be a "national" in a sense, not a missionary. You mentioned wanting to strengthen the bridge between missionaries and nationals; if I'm right and you're a dual citizen or something, you're personally feeling that gap between the communities, even though you belong in both.
That's sort of where I was going with the question about whether being licensed in the Mexican church made it difficult for you to really connect with the missionary community. If you're an American working there and viewing yourself as a missionary, but licensed through the national church because you're also a Mexican citizen or resident, you might not be finding the right kind of resources to meet your personal needs - namely, you're treated as a national in many ways, and like you said, you have different perspectives from other missionaries on some things because you just live there. But on the other hand, you deal with the same cross-cultural stresses as a missionary, because you are American. Sort of fitting in both, but fitting in neither, might amplify feelings of loneliness.
But I don't know. I'm just throwing ideas out there, based on lots of assumptions. I don't KNOW if being a dual citizen could complicate things in the way I described, yet I IMAGINE that it could. I hope it's helpful and not confusing.
quote:
I'm curious as to what people would think if we were to return to the states and take short missions trips? Give me your feed back from someone who only knows me from what I've written. Do you think we could be real effective state side? Or have times so changed that we would be just as frustrated returning home after so much has happened to us here? We're big nobodies in the states! Haha It's a mental thing here, I think it's because the Latins are so relational that everybody is important, they sometimes treat us like we're VIP! It's humbling. That sounds so arrogant.
Another thought, many sending agencies have 4 year terms. Then the missionaries go back for a year. We just completed 4 years. There have times during the year we went back for a month. Last summer, we went back for a remodel during the summer and due to paper work, we were out for 3 months. Are there any other missionaries on the board that have done the 4 year on 1 year off? What are your comments about that? Many missionaries don't go back.
Based on what you've said, I think you could likely feel out of place in either location. In some ways, your situation makes me think of the ways missionary kids can feel - like they are part of one culture (the land or lands their parents' ministered in), part of another (the land their parents are from), yet not really a part of anything. Yet, Hebrews 11 talks about heroes of the faith being people who recognized "that they were aliens and strangers on earth." I can only guess how tough that would be to feel like you don't have a "home", but if you can, as Hebrews 13:14 advises, look for the enduring city that is to come, the place you truly have a home.
Missionaries who come home on furlough aren't exactly taking the year off. Yes, they get to see family more, but they travel a great deal raising funds and strengthening relationships with the churches that send them, too. Where are you from? With me being in Oklahoma, Guadalajara doesn't feel that far away, so I'm a little biased. But I would think you could just come home more often, versus living in the States, and get much of the same benefit, since you don't have to itinerate.
If you want to strengthen relationships with the national church, you've got to live in Mexico. Coming home for a year would be one thing, but if you live in the States and only go to Mexico for trips\crusades, my guess is you won't be happy. That's the kind of non-relational missions work I get the impression you aren't hugely fond of.
< Message edited by stimulus -- 3/28/2008 4:46:17 PM >
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RE: missionary - 3/27/2008 10:33:55 PM
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stimulus
Posts: 180
Joined: 6/4/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: funny_girl
LOL! stimulus!!!! You went to a Danilo Montero worship concert!!!! Remember! If my memory serves me right. Danilo is a well known worship artist in Latin America. Kinda like the Darlene Zschech from Hillsongs or the Gaither's from the English world. Were you there?
That must have been another team, maybe last year? The team I was on was there in 2006. We really didn't do anything but walk around two college campuses all day, praying and trying to talk with students. One day, I went with a couple of the students in the Engage program (except it was called AIM-something-or-other back then) to a poor community where they held a simple sidewalk Sunday School and I operated a puppet for a bit and hugged a couple kids. The only real outreach we did was inviting college students to a local coffee house for an 'open mic' night, giving us a chance to get to know a few students and just sorta scope out the land. No one got saved, no big testimony to gloat over.
I hope it doesn't sound I think the trip was worthless because we didn't "do" anything. In comparison to the other missions trip I went on (a six week 'internship'), I did much less in Guadalajara, but have always felt like it was the trip that likely had the greater significance. I started a ministry for international students on my campus through Chi Alpha, and spending a week praying and discussing options to start ministry in Guadalajara with other student leaders was very meaningful to me. I don't know that I offered any ideas that actually helped the missionaries plan, but deep down, I know I was supposed to be there, just praying and supporting the vision.
quote:
I'm very familiar with this college program you're talking about and we are pushing for it from our end. My husband was very impressed with the work of the team when they ministered at a crusade this past fall.
That's exciting! Like I wrote in the other post, I haven't kept up with has come up the trip. I know the Engage program is there (found that online), and I know my state's Chi Alpha is still trying to reach college students there. I just haven't kept up with them.
quote:
I met some of the team this past fall at the March for Jesus in downtown Guadalajara. 10,000 Christians filled the main plaza! It was amazing! All I knew is that we were going to be leading the A/G church with our van and some sound equipment. I was overwhelmed with how it all unfolded and it was incredible!
I know the event you are talking about. I work for the missions department of another denomination now, and they have a missionary in Guadalajara. I read about the event in his newsletter!
By the way, if you want to, feel free to send me a private message. We might not want to swap too much more information about who we know, what we do, and where we live publicly!
< Message edited by stimulus -- 3/28/2008 4:45:48 PM >
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RE: missionary - 3/27/2008 10:41:00 PM
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funny_girl
Posts: 874
Status: offline
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stimulus,
You are a joy! Ok, I need you to think outside of your denominational box, lol. We, my husband and I are weird! LOL! Sometimes, a good missionary isn't sent from a sending agency. You and I have A/G background and probably know a lot of the same people or at least know who they are. You'd be shocked if I told you but we're 'anonymous' right.
The only thing that makes us different from your A/G missionaries on the field here is that we aren't official A/G missionaries. We used to be many years ago, even graduated from the missionary school, were commissioned, but God had a different plan for us. We resigned that job because I suffered from bulimia for a little while. The Lord took me through a 5 year process which I desperately needed because I didn't have any faith when we were missionaries and wasn't really ready to be a missionary. Praise the Lord, He is faithful and the call of God is without repentance. The Lord didn't open the door for us to be A/G missionaries again but with the blessing of our district, we stepped out in faith and formed a non profit organization.
Through the invitation of a local pastor, the Lord opened the door for us to come to Guadalajara and learn Spanish. Then as one thing led to another, we began working with the pastoral alliances of Guadalajara and began doing crusades. There is a movement for unity within the denominations, praise the Lord and we're able to cross denominational lines by being independent.
We didn't have any Americans to bond with when we came to Mexico so we bonded with the Mexicans and they influenced our thinking and told us what they think about missionaries!!!!! Good sometimes and not so good other times. The A/G has had some wonderful missionaries that have left a legacy here, praise the Lord! We want to see even stronger bonds between our missionaries and the nationals. We know that when there is a marriage each person comes in with a certain amount of 'baggage'. Sometimes that baggage effects future relationships. If there are spiritual warriors involved, we've learned that those warriors will fight against each other if they aren't understanding one another. Our hope is that everyone will embrace or respect the vision of the other to accomplish more together! That's because we have different departments and each should have a vision, right? But the bottom line is those visions will benefit the whole body when their is unity and common vision. You scratch my back and I'll scratch yours. There is so much work here that it's overwhelming! We can't do it alone, we need help! We need each other to build His kingdom! People are going to die and go to hell if they aren't shared the love of God! I'm not here for my name, a denominational name, I'm here for His name! Daily I pray that He use us for His glory!
< Message edited by funny_girl -- 3/27/2008 10:57:35 PM >
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RE: missionary - 3/27/2008 11:04:06 PM
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stimulus
Posts: 180
Joined: 6/4/2005
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: funny_girl
stimulus,
You are a joy! Ok, I need you to think out of your denominational box, lol. We, my husband and I are weird! LOL! Sometimes, a good missionary isn't sent from a sending agency. You and I have A/G background and probably know a lot of the same people or at least know who they are. You'd be shocked if I told you but we're 'anonymous' right.
The only thing that makes us different from your A/G missionaries on the field here is that we aren't official A/G missionaries.
Cool! Thanks for posting more of your story. I'm really not a huge denominationally focused person, even though I get why it might have seemed that way. My experiences in Chi Alpha, in fact, weren't big on the denomination, just the Kingdom, and it was their emphasis on what REALLY matters that strengthened my desire (or willingness?) to continue with the denomination.
I understand, of course, how many missionaries - officially appointed or not - today get to the field in unusual ways, and it sounds like you're one of those folks. Actually, being in Chi Alpha and attending a secular college, odd paths to missions are common. My intention for some time was to just work as an engineer overseas, maybe in Japan, helping to plant a church. Something between a "tent-maker" and a "business as missions" strategy. I see that type of role - just living there, working, demonstrating Christ - as hugely important, because you can be independent, not aligned with a particular denomination, and if you're self-supporting, not viewed as a paid religious worker who only "sells" Christ because it's your job.
I didn't end up where I expected either, largely because of my own health problems. Eventually changed my major, and I do different work today because of it. Yes, our steps are ordered by Him, aren't they?
quote:
We didn't have any Americans to bond with when we came to Mexico so we bonded with the Mexicans and they influenced our thinking and told us what they think about missionaries!!!!! Good sometimes and not so good other times. The A/G has had some wonderful missionaries that have left a legacy here, praise the Lord! We want to see even stronger bonds between our missionaries and the nationals. We know that when there is a marriage each person comes in with a certain amount of 'baggage'. Sometimes that baggage effects future relationships. If there are spiritual warriors involved, we've learned that those warriors will fight against each other if they aren't understanding one another. Our hope is that everyone will embrace or respect the vision of the other to accomplish more together! That's because we have different departments and each should have a vision, right? But the bottom line is those visions will benefit the whole body when their is unity and common vision. You scratch my back and I'll scratch yours. There is so much work here that it's overwhelming! We can't do it alone, we need help! We need each other to build His kingdom! People are going to die and go to hell if they aren't shared the love of God! I'm not here for my name, a denominational name, I'm here for His name! Daily I pray that He use us for His glory!
I am so with you on the desire to see Christians work together, regardless of background, to do something meaningful for Christ. There is far too much to be done, and too few laborers, to divide ourselves from each other. It seems to me like missionaries are often more willing to cross those lines than pastors here in America, and I admire that. I even noticed that, at college, others American students leading ministries for international students worked better together than did the American students who led ministries for American students. There were so few of us trying to reach them that I didn't have any desire to duplicate the Bible study for Indian students the Baptist group had going because I might as well start a study for Japanese students instead, and God opened different doors for each group anyways. No one felt threatened, and we referred students to each other, even meeting monthly to coordinate efforts. Although the larger, "American" ministries each of us were a part of said they wanted to work together and not compete, it just didn't happen regularly.
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RE: missionary - 4/11/2008 11:37:43 AM
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funny_girl
Posts: 874
Status: offline
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What is normal? I think I've forgotten what it's like to have a normal life. I think that we've gotten to do some really exciting things that when it's the normal time 90% of the time, I feel like I'm missing something. Anyone else have an exciting ministry with conferences, concerts or such that has a hard time re adjusting to the down time?
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