Now what do I do? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Faith] >> Ministry Leaders



Message

Itooamcalled -> Now what do I do? (5/14/2008 11:42:22 AM)

OK, here is goes.

My husband and myself are both credentialed ministers. We went into ministry full time at age 40yrs after our kids were out of the house. We both had worked in the church for over 20 yrs and felt God call us out.

3 1/2 years ago we went to a great church, only 63 people but awesome. Within 6 months there were 200 attending. God was doing great things, then it all started to fall apart.

First, there was a family, as there always is, that tried to tell my husband how to run the church..........When my husband addressed this, in a loving way, they got mad and left the church taking many with them.

The began to heal and then we found out that one of the board members, actually the secretary of the board, was wanted by the Feds. for stealing over $94 mil. And when he went into hiding, another board member starting aidding him.

When we went for help to our District, they were awesome by the way, they counseled us to hire an Attny. He told us to talk to the people involved and warn them that if they did not turn themselves in, it would be very bad for them when they were caught.

Sooooooooooo, we spoke with all involved. That scared them and they began to send death threats..

Fast forward one year, exactly one year ago this month. My husband had a nervous/emotional breakdown. We left that church 4 months later and he is not working at our home church as the janitor.

Here is my question..................I still feel the call to be in full time ministry and can't think of anything but doing that.................however, can't right now.

Can't do anything really. Not on staff at home church and totally wanting to come under senior pastor there, but have talked to him and let him know I am available to do or help in anyway..............However, since we've been home (9 months) nothing.

I feel lost and don't really know how to proceed. Havn't heard anyting clearly from God yet.

Anyone ever go through anything like this before? If so, how did you handle it.



pstrdebi -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/14/2008 6:43:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Itooamcalled

First, there was a family, as there always is, that tried to tell my husband how to run the church..........When my husband addressed this, in a loving way, they got mad and left the church taking many with them......


Wow!! I am sorry you went through all of that. Isn't just like the enemy to come in like a flood and rip people apart.

quote:


Here is my question..................I still feel the call to be in full time ministry and can't think of anything but doing that.................however, can't right now.

Can't do anything really. Not on staff at home church and totally wanting to come under senior pastor there, but have talked to him and let him know I am available to do or help in anyway..............However, since we've been home (9 months) nothing.

I feel lost and don't really know how to proceed. Havn't heard anyting clearly from God yet.

Anyone ever go through anything like this before? If so, how did you handle it.


Sometimes God's silence is deafening. It is so hard to go through those times.

My husband and I have been going through those silences for the past year. We felt called to begin this start-up church... and it has been such a slow-go. We've been praying for property (to build), for the people, for folks to undergird us, etc. But it seems that at this time God is growing us, rather than the church. He has been doing so much in our learning, our teaching, etc... that it's an incredible difference from last year to now. He has been giving us revelation knowledge, dreams and visions... more than I could write here.

And all of this came after a previous (somewhat) bad experience. We were ministering as pastors in another capacity, directing a faith-based drug and alcohol rehab. God used that time for extended learning.

I guess what I'm getting to is this; God wants the best for us, and He wants us to be His best. So in these silent times, don't be discouraged (I'm preachin' to myself here [:)])... just abide in Him.

1 John 2:6 says, "He who says he abides in Him ought himself also to walk just as He walked."

The word “walking” speaks of regularly moving at a certain pace. And we are told that Enoch walked with God. But what does that mean?

“Can two walk together, unless they are agreed?” Amos 3:3. The idea of walking is to be walking in pace with someone, in harmony with another.

When my husband, who is almost 6 ft. tall, and I (5'2") go to Costco... He is on a mission and I have to almost run to keep up with him. His stride is much wider than mine and I have to remind him to slow down so that I can walk beside him.

Lots of times it's that way when we walk with God; many times we run ahead of Him and many times we drop behind. (I would say that most times we try to run ahead). Especially when we're passionate about something... we want to get busy... we want to see change... lives saved, etc. We have a mission!

Many Times God wants the same outcome as we do... He wants to see us saving lives, changing heearts, etc. But sometimes (sometimes? [8|]) He has us wait. and that's where the problem comes in. We're ready now and He's not. We need to abide in Him, walk along side of Him, moving in harmony with Him.

How do we do this? We get up in the morning and spend time with God. We take time to read the Bible... and make time to pray.... and pray... and pray. And when we're done... pray. God already knows your dreams... He just wants to hear you talk about them. Just like a husband and wife dream and plan... God wants that relationship too.

This is how we've been handleing it... and God has been revealing Himself, as I said, through dreams and visions and other ways... and although we're still waiting for the answers... we are assured that He has heard the cries of our hearts. (Psalm 40:1). It is a long hard road... but Jesus never said it would be easy... He said the exact opposite.

God is growing you, deeper in the things of God and strengthening you for what is to come. We are the remnant... we need to be strong in order to stand.

God has a plan for you... "Be strong and courageous..." (Joshua 1:9) He will cause it to come to pass. Read Psalm 37:1-8... and be encouraged.

Much love...
Pastor Debi [;)]



pstrdebi -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/14/2008 6:56:15 PM)

I forgot... [:)]

Here are two really great books to read:
"Dreaming With God"
"Strengthening Yourself In The Lord"
Both are by a pastor named Bill Johnson from Bethel Church in Redding, CA

Link: http://www.ibethel.org/store/Books/c25/index.html?osCsid=ddf1698c015b0705d421c0dba46e1503



Itooamcalled -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/15/2008 2:54:35 AM)

Thanks for the encouragement. I know God is still there...............just out of step puts it in perspective.

As I read your post, I couldn't keep the tears back. Seems like God is trying to tell me something. See He made me with this, "Let's get it done" personallity and Waiting in silence is not an easy thing for me.

I know Bill Johnson and his stuff is awesome.

I will be praying for all the things your hearts are dreaming.

Thank you again.
CyndyCay



pstrdebi -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/15/2008 1:29:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Itooamcalled

Thanks for the encouragement. I know God is still there...............just out of step puts it in perspective.

As I read your post, I couldn't keep the tears back. Seems like God is trying to tell me something. See He made me with this, "Let's get it done" personallity and Waiting in silence is not an easy thing for me.

I know Bill Johnson and his stuff is awesome.

I will be praying for all the things your hearts are dreaming.

Thank you again.
CyndyCay


Hi CyndyCay....

I too have that personality.... and that is why (I'm sure) that God doesn't give me all of His plan ahead of time. He Knows my personality, and I'll say, "Ok God... I'm on it... let me make a chart and I'll do this, and I'll do that... we'll call a meeting... and make a blueprint..." Yeah...not always so good. I am a "hands on" kinda person, both my husband and I are... however, he has a lot more patience than I do... That is why God gave him to me. Patience and waiting are hard work!

My husband gave me a verse for you last night after I had already posted...
1 Peter 5:6, "Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time..."

God bless you... and thank you for your prayers!
write any time!
Love, Pastor Debi



funny_girl -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/15/2008 1:55:12 PM)

Dear Itooamcalled,

I'm sorry you had to go through that whole situation, how traumatic!

We're about the same age and have been in full time ministry for 20 years. We've had some success and some failures. I want to encourage you that God isn't done with you yet. The good work that He has begun, He's faithful to bring it all to fruition.

You're first priority, after the Lord, is ministering to your wonderful husband. I too am in a place where perhaps I could have a flown out and had more exposure than I do, but it just doesn't seem to work with my husbands makeup. I grieved the loss for almost 2 years and was able to give it all to God, with all my heart, but it took a long time.



funny_girl -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/15/2008 1:56:16 PM)

My priority after my Lord is making my home homey and taking care of my family. How long this season I will be, I don't know. I now have some physical problems and I'm not as quick or as exuberant about doing the things I was before. If God doesn't speak clearly or open the door, don't move from this place of quiet refuge. He is still refining you for greater things that will come. Trust him in this. Though your heart aches to be used, know that he is using you to love and uphold your precious husband.



Itooamcalled -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/15/2008 3:26:02 PM)

Thanks funny_girl and pstrdebi,

I almost didn't write about this..........I guess I just needed to hear that everything would be ok.........yes I do need to take care of my husband and seems like God wants me to get out of the way so He can do what He wants......

That is my hearts desire..................Thanks for your words, scriptures and prayers.

CyndyCay



EJA -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/15/2008 4:31:08 PM)

quote:

Not on staff at home church and totally wanting to come under senior pastor there, but have talked to him and let him know I am available to do or help in anyway



We are all in the ministry. It's all around us. 24/7.

As far as your home church, when you tell the sr. pastor you are available to 'do or help in any way', you probably won't get much direction from him. You may get more of a response by just putting yourself out there and volunteering in specific areas at the church.

Sunday school, children's church, worship team, etc... Talk to the directors or elders of these and other departments and see where your gifts would be of best use and be open to doing something new.

As far as feeling lost and not knowing how to proceed: Be a blessing wherever you go. But donuts for the staff. Pay for someones lunch or dinner. Help someone in distess and in their time of need.


From Isaiah 58:

6“Is this not the fast which I choose,
To loosen the bonds of wickedness,
To undo the bands of the yoke,
And to let the oppressed go free
And break every yoke?

7 “Is it not to divide your bread with the hungry
And bring the homeless poor into the house;
When you see the naked, to cover him;
And not to hide yourself from your own flesh?

8 “Then your light will break out like the dawn,
And your recovery will speedily spring forth;
And your righteousness will go before you;
The glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.

9 “Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
You will cry, and He will say, ‘Here I am.’
If you remove the yoke from your midst,
The pointing of the finger and speaking wickedness,

10 And if you give yourself to the hungry
And satisfy the desire of the afflicted,
Then your light will rise in darkness
And your gloom will become like midday.

11 “And the LORD will continually guide you,
And satisfy your desire in scorched places,
And give strength to your bones;
And you will be like a watered garden,
And like a spring of water whose waters do not fail.

12 “Those from among you will rebuild the ancient ruins;
You will raise up the age-old foundations;
And you will be called the repairer of the breach,
The restorer of the streets in which to dwell.



funny_girl -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/15/2008 10:36:37 PM)

I remembered something after I posted last. We who are ministers help place others where there is need or better when an individual finds a need and fills it. Where are you gifted to serve? Is there a need for you to fill? That takes effort on our part to find which area we could serve best. If you're gifted to work with women's ministries attend the meetings that they have and get acquainted or reacquainted with the present leaders. Begin to help them by cleaning up or serving in whatever capacity you're able to. As you prove yourself faithful, someone should take notice and ask you to take on more responsibilities. That's just an example with how it usually works for me. I just start hanging out in the areas that interest me and it doesn't take long to be given responsibility if I want it. I'm to a place now where I have to say no. I thought it would never happen but it finally did!

I saw a need for our high schoolers to meet and am starting a class for them on Saturday evenings but I don't plan on running it. My goal is to raise up one of my sons to do it. I'm good at starting things and then delegating the responsibilities to someone that is qualified or able to learn/teachable.



Itooamcalled -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/16/2008 12:23:40 PM)

Funny_Girl, so true, so true. I agree with you 100%

However, here is the problen as I see it with doing that:

This is my home church, I grew up here........started ministry here.......was on staff here for 12 years before my husband and I stepped into full time ministry as senior pastor and moved away. ALL of my family lives here, parents, children, aunts, uncles......................Eveyone here knows me and what I love to do and the areas I love to work in.

Remember the story about Jesus not being accepted in his own town...............? That is what I feel is happening now........

I would never just step into a ministry or even volunteer in any area without the OK from the senior pastor as it is really uncomfortable to have minister's attending your church and just doing what they want in ministry..........we have experienced this before and I wouldn't want to put this awesome man of God in that position.

What God seems to be doing...........as I step back and take a look...........is..........maybe changing the direction of our ministry....NOw this is not as easy for me to accept as it is for my husband.

He has decided that he, "would rather work with the unsaved and get them into the family of God than to bother with spoild Christian's and their whinning."

I on the other hand, burn with passion to see the Christian, young or older in the faith, be victorious and grow deeper in their walk with the Lord.

My Husband = Evangelism
I = Discipleship

Now, all we have to do is find a place or ministry where we can both do what God created us for.



funny_girl -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/16/2008 12:41:26 PM)

You two are a great team. You have to have some what of a pastor's heart to be able to disciple. If there aren't any new babies in your home church, than I can see why that wouldn't be the place for you.

Just remember that even though you are in your home church, hanging out in the areas of interest doesn't make you a threat unless you are one. If you come in with the attitude that I know better than it's wrong and you will be frustrated and held back. You aren't above them, more experienced than they are, you are coming in as a servant and when our attitude and motives are correct we usually will be used. When we are secure in who God has made us, we don't need a 'title' to be able to do what we are purposed in life to be/do.

Helping your husband to disciple the babies is fantastic! He probably doesn't have the patience for it and you do! It's when we try and make the other fit into our area of ministry that we feel frustration. Both ministries are important!



pstrdebi -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/16/2008 2:05:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Itooamcalled

My Husband = Evangelism
I = Discipleship

Now, all we have to do is find a place or ministry where we can both do what God created us for. [/color] [/font] [/size] [/font]


Maybe God will send you to Oregon and you can help build the church here! [:D]

Pastor Debi



Itooamcalled -> RE: Now what do I do? (5/18/2008 3:16:49 AM)

If I were to show my husband this thread..............................we would be packing the Uhaul again....

Right now he is trying to find a place where God will us us both.

I on the other hand would need a bit more conformation...................


We will be out of town for about 14 days starting tomorrow so I will chat with you when I return.



Page: [1]



Forum Software © ASPPlayground.NET Advanced Edition 2.5 ANSI