What if ... ?

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rgod -> What if ... ? (8/21/2008 8:39:27 PM)
I thought this might be an interesting discussion. Let's say God revealed to you that you were going to get married on August 21, 2013 and that you'd meet your future spouse for the first time at a New Year's Eve dinner party or service (take your pick) on December 29, 2011. Knowing these two things ... do you think that you'd live your life differently today? How would it affect your future plans? Would you change anything? Why or why not?

Prairiehiker -> RE: What if ... ? (8/21/2008 8:51:07 PM)
Of course, it would change my life. For starters, I'd delete my profile on E Harmony, lol. The biggest change would come from my mind. I won't be thinking about ways to meet people anymore. I'll stop my search completely And focus on other things. I have to admit, trying to find someone does take a bit of mental And emotional energy, so in that respect, I won't be too spent mentally And emotionally because I'd feel so secure knowing that God is directly answering my prayers. WIth other things....like future plans. I'm not sure. I'm planning on buying another house, And completing my designation in the near future. Also, some big holidays planned for the upcoming year. Would I change them? Maybe. Would I prepare my life to start thinking about the future with my partner. I probably would. And I know I'll probably start learning how to cook for two, lol! So, the straight answer? Yes, it will change my life big time, even if the changes are not evident to the rest of the world.

John_O -> RE: What if ... ? (8/21/2008 9:16:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rgod I thought this might be an interesting discussion. Let's say God revealed to you that you were going to get married on August 21, 2013 and that you'd meet your future spouse for the first time at a New Year's Eve dinner party or service (take your pick) on December 29, 2011. Knowing these two things ... do you think that you'd live your life differently today? How would it affect your future plans? Would you change anything? Why or why not? Big what if. Would I change anything? Not that I can think of. I'm working hard to get myself into top shape physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and financially. don't know what else I could be doing. (I'm sure there's something, just don't know what it is)

rgod -> RE: What if ... ? (8/21/2008 9:40:12 PM)
I guess I should answer my own question. Interesting answers thus far. Yeah PrairieHiker - EHarmony would go to the wayside :) Like you, I think that there would be big changes in my life. John_O - I think it is interesting that you are already preparing in many ways - it is making me to think about what the Lord might be requiring me to do as well :) Well, for starters -- I think that I'd probably spend less time cycling up and down in my emotions concerning marriage. I'd feel like I could ... exhale and just relax and enjoy life. I think too, that all of the things that are easier to do as a single - I'd do. But wait ... I'm doing that now, so maybe that wouldn't be a change. Also, I would probably relax around men a lot more and therefore would probably have a lot more guy friends. (I'm kind of uptight now - I wish I could change that but I don't know how.) I'm already preparing to be married - but I'd so totally step up my game. I would make sure that in all areas I was prepared to be a wife by August 21, 2012. Knowing me, I'd probably have milestones and some sort of a spreadsheet with little mini-goals (yeah I'm geeky - and yup I'm anal like that). But - as I write this - I realize that I'd probably mourn a bit too. As much as I want to be married, I've grown to like many things about being single. It wasn't until I was answering Ebony101's thread that I realized how much God blessed me in my single life. So, yes, I'd mourn certain things, even as I excitedly prepare myself for something new :)

Prairiehiker -> RE: What if ... ? (8/21/2008 10:02:43 PM)
quote: Knowing me, I'd probably have milestones and some sort of a spreadsheet with little Mini-goals (yeah I'm geeky - and yup I'm anal like that LOL. You and me would get along well, sista! That's so me. Mini goals, to do list, priority lists, etc. Funny that I don't own a watch (other than my GPS watch that I used for running.) but I know when I'm on target and when I'm lagging behind. I'm not sure I'd mourn the loss of singleness. Maybe I would. I won't know until I get there. I'm so used to being alone that it literally drives me insane when I spend a few days with friends. But yeah, I can definitely relate to what you said about finally relaxing, and breathe a deep sigh of relief.

rgod -> RE: What if ... ? (8/21/2008 10:06:48 PM)
quote: LOL. You and me would get along well, sista! That's so me. Mini goals, to do list, priority lists, etc. Funny that I don't own a watch (other than my GPS watch that I used for running.) but I know when I'm on target and when I'm lagging behind. Yes, we'd really get along because I don't wear a watch either! I just kind of know what time it is usually. I have lots of watches, but I don't wear them - and by the time I think about wearing one ... well the battery is dead. I don't have an alarm clock - I just think about what time I want to wake up and then I just do - usually either right on the dot or a few minutes before. I'm going to start wearing a watch though because I think it will help me to estimate how long it takes to do something (I'm not good at that - except when it comes to driving - I usually know how long it will take me to get someplace). I love making lists of things to do - even if I don't follow through. It is comforting.

John_O -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 10:04:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rgod John_O - I think it is interesting that you are already preparing in many ways - it is making me to think about what the Lord might be requiring me to do as well :) In my life marriage is inevitable (I had a thread posted once with the reasons. it should still be available "Why I know God will bring my new wife to me" or something like that) So it's just a question of who and when. As a side benefit, I feel much better about myself. I am looking good physically (almost good enough to be comfortable in a T-shirt or shirtless again!) I am getting rid of old useless habits and things that have been holding me back, I am more productive at home and even at work, I'm doing much better financially (I was always good with money but I'm handling things much better now) and for the most part I'm emotionally stable (except when people are mean to me WAH WAH WAH). Now if I could just get the garage and attic cleaned out! So even if it takes God a little bit of time (Not too much Lord, please) to bring my wife to me the preparation to be a good husband is providing benefit to me right now. God is so very good to us.

Prairiehiker -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 11:41:31 AM)
quote: In my life marriage is inevitable (I had a thread posted once with the reasons. it should still be available "Why I know God will bring my new wife to me" or something like that) So it's just a question of who and when. John, how can you be sure of this? I wish I had some assurance from God that I would be married. I think that's the hard part--it's the not knowing whether, or if I will find someone. God definitely has done so much work in me that I know that I'm becoming ready to be in a relationship, which I would not have been able to say 5 years ago.

WaitingforBoaz -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 12:53:28 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rgod I thought this might be an interesting discussion. Let's say God revealed to you that you were going to get married on August 21, 2013 and that you'd meet your future spouse for the first time at a New Year's Eve dinner party or service (take your pick) on December 29, 2011. Knowing these two things ... do you think that you'd live your life differently today? How would it affect your future plans? Would you change anything? Why or why not? Wow, my first thought is Yea! I'll be married again! But my second thought is, 5+ years is a really long time. My twins will be grown and in college. I was really hoping they would have a Dad again. I'm kinda hoping that God agrees with me that they need a Dad, and that He'll send one sooner rather than later. How would it change my life? I am going to ignore the timing thing (cuz that is just too upsetting) and I'll focus on the getting married again thing. I have been trying to get my finances in order. I would like to have all my husbands medical bills paid off before I get married, even though some of my friends say that that is rediculous (including the men). I really can't think of anything other than that that I would do differently. Who I am and my walk with the Lord are things that will not be effected by a marriage. I will continue to pursue the Lord with all of my heart and allow him to make the necessary changes in me as he always has, marriage or not. So I would do the same as I am doing now, wait.[:)]

losgan -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 1:29:58 PM)
Actually - this sounds like a pretty realistic schedule for me, ha ha. So of course I wouldn't change anything! That timing would mean having children of my own would likely be out of the question - but I'm pretty sure that is the case as it is. Am I happy about it, not necessarily - but God keeps putting fostering or adopting on my heart. He has for a long time - so I have some peace about that.

John_O -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 2:02:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker quote: In my life marriage is inevitable (I had a thread posted once with the reasons. it should still be available "Why I know God will bring my new wife to me" or something like that) So it's just a question of who and when. John, how can you be sure of this? I wish I had some assurance from God that I would be married. I think that's the hard part--it's the not knowing whether, or if I will find someone. God definitely has done so much work in me that I know that I'm becoming ready to be in a relationship, which I would not have been able to say 5 years ago. How I know God will bring my new wife to me. Here's the link. God has been so very good to me. Read the rest there.

sunshinesoprano -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 2:08:06 PM)
Wow, I dunno. I think I would make preparations financially for my Mom, who told me just last night if we didn't share household expenses she couldn't make it on Social Security Disability. Other than that....maybe not worry as much...but I'm working on that, anyway.

John_O -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 3:10:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinesoprano Wow, I dunno. I think I would make preparations financially for my Mom, who told me just last night if we didn't share household expenses she couldn't make it on Social Security Disability. Other than that....maybe not worry as much...but I'm working on that, anyway. Mother-in-law apartments are common in a lot of homes these days. Gives her her own place yet lets you and your husbnad still take care of her. (and the kidlets if any always can find gramma!)

sunshinesoprano -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 3:11:38 PM)
Good point!!!!

John_O -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 3:16:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinesoprano Good point!!!! Never let a little thing like a mother-in-law (or mother) keep you away from wedded bliss![:D][:D]

derryderrydown -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 4:56:23 PM)
My first thought would be, "Why so long away?", but then I've already waited a long, long time, and would be just thrilled to think that it WILL happen! I would shed those extra pounds that have suddenly appeared after a lifetime of skinniness and really work on getting my stuff straightened out. I would work extra hard on my painting, so I could say I was a well-known artist, instead of a person who painted. But, if "ifs and buts were fruit and nuts, we'd all have a Merry Christmas"... And Mr. Wunnerful would have to love my Dad!

joy2give2u -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 5:14:42 PM)
Hey derrderrydown welcome to the singles forum..........it is always nice to see a new name........[:D][:D] quote: Let's say God revealed to you that you were going to get married on August 21, 2013 and that you'd meet your future spouse for the first time at a New Year's Eve dinner party or service (take your pick) on December 29, 2011. Knowing these two things ... do you think that you'd live your life differently today? How would it affect your future plans? Would you change anything? Why or why not ? This is a hard question for me to answer because it makes me take a good hard look at myself. I do believe God revealed to me that I was going to get married, not on a set date, but I have no doubt that he showed me I would marry..........and since I believe this to be true, that God clearly spoke and showed me I would marry, I have to ask myself why is it so easy to put off the things I need to do in preparation. The even sadder thing to me is that God, along with showing me I would marry, also told me the things I need to do in preparation........many which I have started but never carried through.......... Sadly the answer to your questions do you think you'd live your life differently today is no because it has not so far......... But the positive even if I am not being as proactive as I need to be.......meaning I am not walking in complete obedience to those things God showed me I need to work on......he hasn't lifted his hands in frustration and walked away.........no instead he allows things in my life which force me to deal with those things I don't want to deal with.......sometimes it is very hard yet as I see the results of the hard work.......I wonder why didn't I just do that in the first place LOL God is good and he is directing my daily life each and every day as he goes ahead and prepares my future..........[:D][:D]

derryderrydown -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 5:17:16 PM)
Thanks for the welcome! This sounds like a fun group of people. [:D]

netstroller -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 7:17:01 PM)
quote: I thought this might be an interesting discussion. Let's say God revealed to you that you were going to get married on August 21, 2013 and that you'd meet your future spouse for the first time at a New Year's Eve dinner party or service (take your pick) on December 29, 2011. I guess I'd start looking for good deals on wedding rings and checking the best and cheapest way to do a reception. Probably make some changes too but can't think of any right now.

Mrs.Dawgfan -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 8:35:55 PM)
Netstoller was here! Hey there bro! I have to admit. New Years Eve in 2006 I felt a strongly that G-d was telling me I would meet my future husband that year. Whether you find that suspicious or not this is what I did... I became more "noticing" of men. I had a crush for the first time in two years. lol I had a few actually. But all in all, I didn't really do anything about it. One thing that did change though was that my desire to be a wife all of a sudden got stronger. A big HMMMM at the time. lol

losgan -> RE: What if ... ? (8/22/2008 11:20:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: John_O Mother-in-law apartments are common in a lot of homes these days. Gives her her own place yet lets you and your husbnad still take care of her. (and the kidlets if any always can find gramma!) My parents just did this. It doubles as a room-for-the-adult-kids for now, since my grandparents don't live with them at this point. Actually - I lived there for about a month and a half before I went to grad school, since I was on summer break as a teacher, but grad school hadn't started. It'll also be nice if anyone ever has any little ones, kinda a private area that doesn't wake up the rest of the house during holidays. Is it possible to be hopeful and sad at the same time?

John_O -> RE: What if ... ? (8/23/2008 9:57:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: losgan quote: ORIGINAL: John_O Mother-in-law apartments are common in a lot of homes these days. Gives her her own place yet lets you and your husbnad still take care of her. (and the kidlets if any always can find gramma!) My parents just did this. It doubles as a room-for-the-adult-kids for now, since my grandparents don't live with them at this point. Actually - I lived there for about a month and a half before I went to grad school, since I was on summer break as a teacher, but grad school hadn't started. It'll also be nice if anyone ever has any little ones, kinda a private area that doesn't wake up the rest of the house during holidays. It's a pretty cool arrangement isn't it. I'm planning at some point to moveto the country and all the house designs I look at have that feature. quote: Is it possible to be hopeful and sad at the same time? Of course it is. I'm there all the time. (at least a little. It's not like I'm depressed or anything but I'm not nearly as happy as I could be KWIM?)

losgan -> RE: What if ... ? (8/23/2008 3:06:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: John_O Of course it is. I'm there all the time. (at least a little. It's not like I'm depressed or anything but I'm not nearly as happy as I could be KWIM?) I know exactly what you mean - I dunno if I'd say I'm not as happy as I could be. Now I'm getting into the realm of unexplainable multi-emotions, ha ha.

Onecontent -> RE: What if ... ? (8/24/2008 7:51:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rgod I thought this might be an interesting discussion. Let's say God revealed to you that you were going to get married on August 21, 2013 and that you'd meet your future spouse for the first time at a New Year's Eve dinner party or service (take your pick) on December 29, 2011. Knowing these two things ... do you think that you'd live your life differently today? How would it affect your future plans? Would you change anything? Why or why not? I would start lobbying my church to have a New Years Eve service on December 29th instead of December 31st. or I would try to become the type of person that someone would actually invite to a dinner party. I do not receive such invitations and up to this point, it really has not bothered me. I would invest in savings bonds to so I would have something to pay for a small wedding.

rgod -> RE: What if ... ? (8/24/2008 8:17:44 PM)
quote: I would start lobbying my church to have a New Years Eve service on December 29th instead of December 31st. Oooops!!!! Well ... now that's a looooong service (or dinner party) :) These are interesting responses! It is interesting that a number of people have talked about preparing financially :) Above_All - that is so neat that the Lord prepared you in that way. He is absolutely awesome. I have a friend who had the same thing happen to her. And congratulations - I know your wedding is very soon :)

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