Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (Full Version)

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blessed27 -> Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (8/27/2008 10:26:54 PM)

I would like to find some info in the Bible.

The info I am looking for is something I seemed to have read in the Bible or I may have heard a Christian leader speak of this in church- when I was a teenager. It gave me the impression that "any" s*xual activity "out of marriage" was considered "ADULTEROUS" according to God's word. It had a lot to do with my veiws of dating before I married.

I seem to remember someone actually describing activity of this sort out of marriage with the word "ADULTEROUS".

Am I or was I wrong and where can I find this in the Bible if I am right? (King James version or the NIV).

I made a statement pertaining to this to another person who is a new Christian and this person seemed puzzled. I want to explain it correctly to this person if I am correct in this.

I also feel if this is so that many fall short of teaching the young about the importance of staying pure before marriage. Instead of teaching them to abstain many people these days give them birth control "just in case" they give in..

Thanks ahead of time.



techne -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (8/28/2008 11:01:27 AM)

well, if adultery is defined as emotional/ sexual activity outside of the covenant relationship you have with your wife or husband, and you haven't actually already married the person you are being 'physical' with, then wouldn't it be - by definition - adultery? if they aren't your wife or husband, they are someone else's -- therefore, that activity and relationship is adulterous.

rather than focussing on the allowable activities outside of marriage, why not focus on the richness and importance of activity within the bounds of marriage?

it's not so much that there are specific scriptures (though there are plenty of references to fornicators, adulterers etc) as much as it is simply some basic theo-logical thinking through of the ramifications. there are certainly numerous books available that would lay out exactly these issues.



solarflare -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (8/28/2008 11:46:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: blessed27

I would like to find some info in the Bible.

The info I am looking for is something I seemed to have read in the Bible or I may have heard a Christian leader speak of this in church- when I was a teenager. It gave me the impression that "any" s*xual activity "out of marriage" was considered "ADULTEROUS" according to God's word. It had a lot to do with my veiws of dating before I married.

I seem to remember someone actually describing activity of this sort out of marriage with the word "ADULTEROUS".

Am I or was I wrong and where can I find this in the Bible if I am right? (King James version or the NIV).

I made a statement pertaining to this to another person who is a new Christian and this person seemed puzzled. I want to explain it correctly to this person if I am correct in this.

I also feel if this is so that many fall short of teaching the young about the importance of staying pure before marriage. Instead of teaching them to abstain many people these days give them birth control "just in case" they give in..

Thanks ahead of time.



Why not check it out in Scripture for yourself? There are many good resources online if you do not have a Bible......just do a search on your topic within the Scriptural context.....there is plenty of info available and that way, you can bypass 'opinions' and go right to the source!



DougHorton -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (8/28/2008 5:44:38 PM)

The verse you are looking for is Hebrews 13:4 -
Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. (KJV)

Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. (NIV)

The "marriage bed" is a euphemism for sex within marriage. Of course, sex outside of marriage is sin.



DaveW -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (8/29/2008 2:01:04 PM)

Acts 15 says that Gentile believers are to avoid 4 things, "Fornication" is one of them. The Greek word is pornia which I take to mean any sexual activity that violates the OT scriptures. THe word itself comes from pornas which was a class of sex slaves. Pornia had a meaning in secular Greek - any illicit sexual activity. That would mean for the diaspora Jewish community and the God-fearers (who made up the leadership of most gentile congregations) anything that violated Torah.

Premarital sex definately falls in this category.



DougHorton -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (8/29/2008 3:16:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DaveW

Acts 15 says that Gentile believers are to avoid 4 things, "Fornication" is one of them. The Greek word is pornia which I take to mean any sexual activity that violates the OT scriptures. THe word itself comes from pornas which was a class of sex slaves. Pornia had a meaning in secular Greek - any illicit sexual activity. That would mean for the diaspora Jewish community and the God-fearers (who made up the leadership of most gentile congregations) anything that violated Torah.

Premarital sex definately falls in this category.


Actually, there was no such thing as "premarital sex". The act of sex, according to Torah, whether preceded or followed by a wedding ceremony, was the act of marriage.



DaveW -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (8/29/2008 3:26:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DougHorton

Actually, there was no such thing as "premarital sex". The act of sex, according to Torah, whether preceded or followed by a wedding ceremony, was the act of marriage.
Not so. It is called "playing the whore" in the venacular of the day. It is roundly condemned in scripture.



DougHorton -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (8/29/2008 4:05:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DaveW

quote:

ORIGINAL: DougHorton

Actually, there was no such thing as "premarital sex". The act of sex, according to Torah, whether preceded or followed by a wedding ceremony, was the act of marriage.
Not so. It is called "playing the whore" in the venacular of the day. It is roundly condemned in scripture.


That was when you payed for sex with a woman who was not a virgin.

Sex with a non-virgin or betrothed virgin = adultery.
Sex with a virgin = marriage.

Exodus 22:16,17; Deuteronomy 22:23 - 29



sledmt -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (8/29/2008 11:01:21 PM)

I Tim 5:2

If Timothy was exhorted to treat young ladies as sisters, then I believe that we should too.



blessed27 -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (8/31/2008 2:52:27 AM)

This question is not referring to me personally but rather to something someone stated to me recently during a conversation. I just wanted to know if the Bible ever refers sex outside of marriage for two people who are neither married as adultery or if any one here had ever heard a teacher or preacher refer to it as such.

I see much food for thought here also as I have been studying the Bible a lot this year. Thanks for all your answers.



DougHorton -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (9/5/2008 10:33:16 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: blessed27

This question is not referring to me personally but rather to something someone stated to me recently during a conversation. I just wanted to know if the Bible ever refers sex outside of marriage for two people who are neither married as adultery or if any one here had ever heard a teacher or preacher refer to it as such.

I see much food for thought here also as I have been studying the Bible a lot this year. Thanks for all your answers.


Yes, the Torah is quite clear that if two unmarried people have sex, the man is to pay the bride price and they are to be considered married. See the references I previously posted.



Lufia -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (9/6/2008 10:32:30 AM)

So in God's eye i'm married if i have sex with the same man? I mean, in my case i'm not married and i've been with the same man for 19years. So before God i'm married?



ta_mosquito -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (9/6/2008 12:22:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lufia

So in God's eye i'm married if i have sex with the same man? I mean, in my case i'm not married and i've been with the same man for 19years. So before God i'm married?


No. In the OT, the man had to pay a "bride price" which is part of a ceremony or rite of marriage. Since you've done nothing like that (or had any other kind of ceremony or rite or whatever), before God, you have an illicit sexual relationship, or "fornication."

Sorry if it sounds harsh.



Lufia -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (9/6/2008 1:24:20 PM)

So if i get married ( not a religious one) i'll be 'ok' with God?



MrFribbles -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (9/6/2008 2:07:22 PM)

quote:

So if i get married ( not a religious one) i'll be 'ok' with God?


Depends on what you mean by "OK". God wouldn't see any actions with your husband past that point as fornication. But that doesn't erase what you did in the past. Now, in an eternal sense, those sins would be forgiven (that is, they won't keep you out of heaven), but God gives us consequences for our sins. So it wouldn't be "OK" in the sense that God would absolutely not hold you accountable in any way for your sins.



Theophile2 -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (9/6/2008 2:41:12 PM)

Genesis 34:2,7 : “And when Shechem the son of Hamor the Hivite, prince of the country, saw her [Dinah], he took her, and lay with her, and defiled her … he [Shechem] had wrought folly in Israel in lying with Jacob’s daughter [Dinah]; which thing ought not to be done.”

Genesis 39:7-9 : “… his [Joseph’s] master’s wife cast her eyes upon Joseph; and she said, Lie with me. But he refused … because thou art his wife: how then can I do this great wickedness, and sin against God?”

Exodus 20:14,17; 23:16; 34:12,16
Leviticus 18:6-20, 22; 19:29; 20:10-21 (repeats Lev 18:6-22)
Numbers 5:12:13
Deuteronomy 22:21-30 … no premarital sex … no adultery ;
Deuteronomy 23:17 … no extramarital sex.
Deuteronomy 27:20-23 (repeats Lev 18:6-22)
2 Samuel 13:11-12,14-16 … premarital sex folly, evil.
Hosea 4:11
Proverbs 6:24-26, 32-33
2 Samuel 11 David and Bathsheba.
2 Samuel 13 Prince Absalom and Princess Tamar.
1 Kings 11 Solomon and his many wives from unbelieving nations.
Judges 16 Samson and Delilah.


1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 “For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one should take advantage of and defraud his brother in this matter, because the Lord is the avenger of all such, as we also forewarned you and testified. For God did not call us to uncleanness, but in holiness. Therefore he who rejects this does not reject man, but God, who has also give us His Holy Spirit.”

Romans 1:24-25
1 Corinthians 6:9-10, 15-20
1 Peter 2:11

May the Word of God be salt and light to a dark world ...

[sm=icon_smile_fish.gif]



Lufia -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (9/6/2008 7:47:32 PM)

So you mean, Mrfribbles, that God even if we get married, will punish us? He will forgive us but still punish us?

Because maybe we are not married but i never had another man, and my 'man' never had any other woman.



ta_mosquito -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (9/7/2008 9:01:31 AM)

quote:

So you mean, Mrfribbles, that God even if we get married, will punish us? He will forgive us but still punish us?

What do you men by "punish"? If you decide to defy the law of gravity and jump from the Empire State Building, then halfway down repent and plead forgiveness, God will forgive you. But He probably won't change the laws of gravity so that you have a nice, soft landing.

You may not have the same natural consequences that would occur if either of you had been promiscuous. However, there still may be some natural consequences. I'm not sure what they'd be. But that's not God punishing you; that's simply the natural consequences.

I hope this makes sense.



chrisovery -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (9/7/2008 10:21:30 AM)

this is a great discussion. i am quite surprised at the posts hear. the only one that i found with any kind of real truth is the scriptures put up by theophile2. the bible states that sex with someone that is married to someone else or having sex with someone else outside of your own marriage is adultery. sex with someone without being married is fornication.

but i dont think that this is what makes it important in our lives. i think the point that we need to truly ask ourselves about is: 1. are we comitting these acts against god? 2. if we are or we have are we repenting of them?



MrFribbles -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (9/7/2008 11:30:46 AM)

I'll just add "ditto" to what ta_mosquito said.



Lufia -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (9/7/2008 8:40:20 PM)

Well, even if not married , i don't see the (bad ?) natural consequences of sleeping with the same man for nearly 20 years. It's really not the same thing as gravity! I've been with the same man for all that time and nothing 'bad' has happen to us regarding our sexuality. And you know what? I've been born again for about 7 months now and our sexuality is better then ever! There is a big difference since we are born again! I can't explain it but it is true.

And yes we will get married. Today we went for the first time to a baptist church and we loved it a lot.



Theophile2 -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (9/7/2008 8:55:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lufia

Well, even if not married , i don't see the (bad ?) natural consequences of sleeping with the same man for nearly 20 years. It's really not the same thing as gravity! I've been with the same man for all that time and nothing 'bad' has happen to us regarding our sexuality. And you know what? I've been born again for about 7 months now and our sexuality is better then ever! There is a big difference since we are born again! I can't explain it but it is true.

And yes we will get married. Today we went for the first time to a baptist church and we loved it a lot.


And when you get married, is when God will sanctify your relationship. But having sex before you are married does not become justified by getting married.

Note:
Ro 2:4-6 Or do you despise the riches of His kindness, and the forbearance and long-suffering, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance? (5) But according to your hardness and your impenitent heart, do you treasure up wrath for yourself in a day of wrath and revelation of the righteous judgment of God, (6) who will render to each according to his works.

Ecc 8:11-13 Because the sentence against an evil deed is not executed speedily, the heart of the children of man is fully set to do evil. (12) Though a sinner does evil a hundred times and prolongs his life, yet I know that it will be well with those who fear God, because they fear before him. (13) But it will not be well with the wicked, neither will he prolong his days like a shadow, because he does not fear before God.

Praise God you are now a born again Christian, whose sins are cleansed and removed by the blood of Jesus.

May your eyes be opened to the sanctification of the Holy Spirit.

May God richly bless your future Christian marriage with your future husband.

[sm=icon_smile_fish.gif]



DaveW -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (9/8/2008 12:40:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lufia

So in God's eye i'm married if i have sex with the same man? I mean, in my case i'm not married and i've been with the same man for 19years. So before God i'm married?
No.

Marriage is a covenant. A covenant is a binding agreement made before witnesses.

Sex is a seal or a sign of the covenant, much like wearing a wedding ring. Having sex no more makes you married than wearing a ring (without the commitment part) does.



kingdele -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers (9/9/2008 3:01:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lufia

Well, even if not married , i don't see the (bad ?) natural consequences of sleeping with the same man for nearly 20 years. It's really not the same thing as gravity! I've been with the same man for all that time and nothing 'bad' has happen to us regarding our sexuality. And you know what? I've been born again for about 7 months now and our sexuality is better then ever! There is a big difference since we are born again! I can't explain it but it is true.

And yes we will get married. Today we went for the first time to a baptist church and we loved it a lot.



I am actually suprised that you will call yourself a "Born-again" Christian and be happy about engaging in premarital sex. I will advice you to study the book of 1st John and objectively weigh yourslf against the scale of God's word. Don't believe some superstitious words that some so-called evangelist told you to repeat, but test yourself and see if you are in the faith 2Corinthians 13:5. These sermons will help you do that, please listen to them in order and to all of them please.

1) True Salvation
http://www.sermonaudio.com/sermoninfo.asp?SID=5220621750

2) Justification
http://www.sermonaudio.com/sermoninfo.asp?SID=5220621750

3) Regeneration
http://www.sermonaudio.com/sermoninfo.asp?SID=63006232159



If you come short, please repent and believe for the salvation of your soul.



kingdele -> RE: Where in the Bible are veiws on physical activities out of the marriage bed? Ministers- teachers.. (9/9/2008 3:23:01 AM)

About the original Question,

The easiest thing to do is to go to www.blueletterbible.org or www.biblegateway.com and do a search of a few key words; fornication, adultery, sexual immorality, etc...

(in Biblegateway, you can type half of the word in thier search engine and it will give you good results. eg fornicat, adulte, etc)


I am sorry to have to say this, but your question exposed something that really concerns me about your christian walk. I doesn't seem like you study the bible. I would advice you to start by becoming more familiar with the bible yourself (2 Timothy). Don't wait on another person like a pastor or fiends to tell you what the bible says, because their are many people who are being used by the devil to decieve people into commiting sin and this is only possible because people are not studying the bible for themselves.

I really love what you did that you asked for help when you needed it, but the times are coming when you will face situations that you wouldn't have time to ask others and you will have to be the teacher. Please be rooted and grounded in the word. I would wish to tell you a story about how I started studying the Bible for myself but I am really speepy and I have a lot to do in the morning.

Please don't take this the wrong way but I say this because I love you. Anyone who professes christ, I have a kinship with them.



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