RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight?
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 9/29/2008 2:25:01 PM
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Mustardseedz
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I think the extra weight is indicative of a lot of other issues that are concerning. We are called to be good stewards of ALL the resources the Lord gave us...including our health and the temple that houses the Holy Spirit. The Lord really convicted me of this over the last couple of months.
No, being overweight doesn't necessarily mean being lazy but our health has to be a priority if we are actually going to run the race we are supposed to be running.
I have been working very hard on getting into healthier habits over the last few months and recently started dating a guy that is overweight. At this point I'm waiting on the Lord's direction but my concerns are 1) overeating is often used to hide from or avoid emotional issues, 2) his general health (he has admitted that he's getting more health issues), 3) how much harder will it be for me (and our potential family) to stay healthy without his contribution to this effort?
So, it isn't always just a matter of appearance. The choices we make affect others in the body of Christ and our friends and family.
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 10/14/2008 6:18:51 PM
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RamiRedeemed
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I dont find it unattractive at all. I think a man who is constantly self conscious about his weight and constantly trying to diet is more unattractive, IMO.
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 10/20/2008 7:35:19 AM
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TNBelle
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Knolt
I wonder if it's a turn off to you ladies if a guy is fat. I've seen a lot of posts lately about overweight women. but what about you? Is it a turn-off if a man is overweight? Don't mince words. show unflinching honesty.
Not at all! In fact, if we're talking about attraction "across a crowded room" so to speak, I've always preferred Big&Tall. Of course, personality and character count for so much more than the packaging. A person becomes much more attractive or unattractive (no matter their size) once you get to know them. But no, an overweight man is not and never has been a turn-off for me.
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 10/21/2008 3:42:43 PM
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elastic
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i have dated all kinds of men....the only ones i am NOT attracted to are lanky, blonde..and shorter than i am.
nothing wrong with those people. they didn't sin to get that way, but i am not attracted to them. i am sure there are some perfectly nice short, lanky, blondies out there in the world.
i have dated heavier guys (i myself am a heavy girl)...i'd rather a guy be heavy and a fantastic person than a person obsessed with just looking thin all the time. to me, that guy would be a narcissist...there are many women out there who fit that profile as well.
for me, weight doesn't say anything about how a person takes care of themselves....grooming says much more to me about that sort of things. dirty fingernails all the time, sloppy clothes, etc....now, that would be unattractive, but a big guy who is well put together would be fine.
of course, i'm married now, so none of this really applies to me anymore. luckily, my dh is attracted to big women, so we are very happy.
_____________________________
"Let's get something straight, kid. The only reason you're still conscious is because I don't want to carry you. " Jack Bauer
 I Stand with Israel!
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 10/29/2008 12:45:01 PM
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DuckTalk
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From: A Duck Hole in Tennessee
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My unflinching honesty is to say that,
"To even think about a person's weight in such a selfish manner (how it would affect ME or MY attraction to them) would only confer that I am the most "conditional" lover anyone could ever hope not to find".
NO, it is not a turn-off.
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 11/1/2008 11:42:51 AM
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beachcooky
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Wow--I'm the only shallow person here.
If he's a little bit overweight (probably 20-30 pounds overweight), then that's fine. I would date him.
But if he's much over, I don't really find him attractive. But again, I haven't met an amazing guy since last year. So if I meet an amazing guy who weighs a lot and I really like him, then I probably wouldn't care.
But I'm shallow and I hate it. haha.
< Message edited by beachcooky -- 11/2/2008 12:47:03 PM >
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 11/1/2008 8:26:33 PM
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song
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From: Southern Florida
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quote:
Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight?
No.
I'm "overweight" according to most people standards and I check out fine with the doctor. My blood pressure and cholesterol are fine too. I chase kids around all day and I love swimming, walking, travel a lot, etc. People are just built differently. Size doesn't usually say anything about your lifestyle or health in my personal opinion. And skinny doesn't equal healthy either. 
The things I care about in a potential date/husband have nothing to do with appearance anyways. Unfortunately though it's not usually my insides that matter most to the men I meet. Oh well. I think there's a million more important things in life then worrying about being a certain size.
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you are beautiful my sweet sweet song...
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 11/8/2008 2:51:47 PM
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Odile
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What I do find unattractive is arrogance, egotism, prejudice and chauvinism; or no self respect. In that, a guy who is overweight simply because he doesn't care about his body (and that is not the same as not caring about body image), but doesn't care what happens to him.... that is a turn off. Otherwise, I actually prefer big guys!
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 11/8/2008 3:42:53 PM
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Prairiehiker
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When it comes to looks, I'm quite flexible. I have to find the man attractive and what I find attractive is anyone tall, and medium built. Beyond that, it's really the personality that would attract me.
I've dated and fell in love with someone who was 30 lbs overweight (he's probably more now). He's one of my great true loves (there's only 2), Our meeting had a sign of Divine intervention. I saw him across a crowded room lol, about 2 months prior to our meeting, and for two months, I wished I'd meet him. Then, on his last day at work, he got seated beside me for 12 hours straight. And we clicked and talked non stop for 12 hours. It turned out that he felt the same as I did when he saw me that day that we first saw each other and he'd been asking about me for 2 months. Unfortunately, the day we met, he was in the process of moving 600 km away to our other office. That began a few years of LDR.
He was overweight but he carried the weight well. Since we were apart, I didn't experience how his lack of exercises would have affected our relationship. If I were to meet him now, I don't know if I'd go out with him because he won't be able to keep up with me. We'll be doing completely different things. We have no common interests. His weight wasn't a problem before, so now, I think it would be his sedentary lifestyle that would make me lose interest. However, he was such an admirable man, that if he had decided to move here with me, I'm sure I'd make some concession. That's what love does.
< Message edited by Prairiehiker -- 11/8/2008 4:46:11 PM >
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 11/24/2008 4:35:44 PM
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momndaboyz
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In all honesty - you asked if a guy was "fat" would it matter? What about your best friend? Aren't we suppose to be looking at the heart? This is the person we vow to spend our earthly lives with and these are bodies we are judging each other by. I suppose it's okay to have a light hearted preference - certain hair colors attractive to you or height or you just feel safe around taller men. The issue of couch potato can be true of thin or heavy people. Not slamming the OP - it's a valid discussion but makes me sad a little too.God really put this issue on my heart as a young girl to look past the outer shell. Bodies change, weight can go up and down. Sadly we also change in appearance when we age and cannot help it - we can only try to lessen the appearance (grey hair,wrinkles). None of us will look the same at 60 as we did on our wedding day. My opinion if it's attractive? Sure, if presented well! If a man is paying attention to his appearance, hygenic, attempting to wear clothes that flatter him, does his best is a very attractive person. Severe obesity in itself - male or female is not attractive but aren't we set apart as Christians to examine the heart? How can we even answer the question "does he exercise" if we don't look past the curves and get to know the person. Many people do exercise but do not look as if they do. A man who struggles to stay fit but forgoes the gym for family time or working overtime to support his loved ones makes a greater sacrifice than the hottest looking gym dweller. I sure am glad my husband was attracted to me with all my flaws - especially the ones in my personality!
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 11/24/2008 10:05:47 PM
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song
Posts: 298
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From: Southern Florida
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quote:
ORIGINAL: momndaboyz
In all honesty - you asked if a guy was "fat" would it matter? What about your best friend? Aren't we suppose to be looking at the heart? This is the person we vow to spend our earthly lives with and these are bodies we are judging each other by. I suppose it's okay to have a light hearted preference - certain hair colors attractive to you or height or you just feel safe around taller men. The issue of couch potato can be true of thin or heavy people. Not slamming the OP - it's a valid discussion but makes me sad a little too.God really put this issue on my heart as a young girl to look past the outer shell. Bodies change, weight can go up and down. Sadly we also change in appearance when we age and cannot help it - we can only try to lessen the appearance (grey hair,wrinkles). None of us will look the same at 60 as we did on our wedding day. My opinion if it's attractive? Sure, if presented well! If a man is paying attention to his appearance, hygenic, attempting to wear clothes that flatter him, does his best is a very attractive person. Severe obesity in itself - male or female is not attractive but aren't we set apart as Christians to examine the heart? How can we even answer the question "does he exercise" if we don't look past the curves and get to know the person. Many people do exercise but do not look as if they do. A man who struggles to stay fit but forgoes the gym for family time or working overtime to support his loved ones makes a greater sacrifice than the hottest looking gym dweller. I sure am glad my husband was attracted to me with all my flaws - especially the ones in my personality!
Aw. Thumbs up. 
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you are beautiful my sweet sweet song...
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 11/25/2008 11:22:52 PM
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heavencomedown
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The first thing that attracts me is the way they look.. then, personality, then find out if they are Christian. If weight is an issue of something they cant control, its ok, but if they just dont want to do anything about it then thats another. i wouldnt be attracted to a guy that is super over weight, but 10 to 20 lbs is ok. There is a man at my work who is the sweetest ever and is about 20 lbs over, He has the best personality ever! id try to get to know the guy first before ruling him out. The man would have to be a Christian before Id date him, ever. I work with men non Christians and they are the rudest bunch ever.. they have no problem about saying the most rudest things in fron to f me. has to be Christian from the get go! id date a overwieght guy b4 a non believer any l time.
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 11/27/2008 2:33:02 AM
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cheeky_monkey
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It's not the overweightness that bothers me but rather the unhealthiness. I exercise and take care of myself and really wish my husband would do the same thing. It has nothing to do with his physical appearance at all. I just wish he cared more about his health.
I do want to add that I don't think he's considered overweight, but if he doesn't start to exercise he'll definitely be there eventually.
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 12/5/2008 7:32:56 PM
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DerWeg
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Yes. No man boobs for me, thanks.
However, super skinny guys are a turnoff as well. Then again so are super muscular. I guess I just like...average?
But also....a little bit husky/teddy-bearish is kind of nice. Would probably be nice to cuddle with.
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 12/7/2008 11:45:24 PM
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ladioffaith
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I am overweight and not shrinking dramatically any time soon, so the short answer is no.
HOWEVER there is a big difference between somebody overweight and somebody who is literally weighed down. I once went out with a man and was turned off, not necessarily by his weight, but that he seemed very unhealthy both physically AND emotionally. And he kept projecting his lack of self-esteem onto me, assuming I suffered from the same.
For various reasons, emotional health is at the top of my priority list.
_____________________________
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The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with
his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." Zeph. 3:17
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 12/8/2008 11:55:58 PM
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Completelyloved
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When I was younger and skinner, I always dated thinner men. Now that I am ALOT curvier I can't see myself with a skinny man. Although, I am not attracted to football or weightlifter types either. So I guess I am more middle of the road. He doesn't have to have a six pack but a Winnie the Pooh beer belly isn't cute either. On a series note, I feel that whomever the Lord brings me I will be proud of because he is the man for me whether he wears a size 28 or 38.
< Message edited by Completelyloved -- 12/9/2008 12:15:45 AM >
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 12/12/2008 7:02:45 PM
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TavelCT
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I am also athletic and run marathons so the guys that I have been interested are usually within their healthy weight range.
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RE: Women, is it a turn off to you if a GUY is overweight? - 12/15/2008 6:01:54 PM
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xoxmelxox
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I don't mind a guy at all to have a little meat on his bones. I would not find a morbidly obese man as attractive as I would an average sized man, but I think that is more along the lines of showing that he takes pretty good care of himself.
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